Philotic Web

I'm not "hiding" it from Ev, the nine year old, I'm just not sure if I should tell him right at the moment. For starters, he's pretty immature, even for a nine-year-old, and either wouldn't get it or not know when it was appropriate to make jokes or mention it. He's also terrible at keeping his mouth shut which might sound paranoid but news like that has a way of getting around.

The moment I tell him that I'm also into guys he'll probably get it into his head that I'm gay and go around telling everyone, "Hey, this is my brother, he's blind and he's gay too." He has a habit of telling complete strangers at the shops all of our life stories.

So I'm not hiding it, I'm really just not sure that it's a good idea to tell him. If I start dating guys, I think I'll have to though.

You entirely missed my point -which was, if an opportunity presented itself to tell him, where it made more sense to tell him than not and where the alternative would be to hide it, then by all means, tell him but don't rush to tell him now just to feel like you have to tell everyone right this second- but okay. :)

You entirely missed my point -which was, if an opportunity presented itself to tell him, where it made more sense to tell him than not and where the alternative would be to hide it, then by all means, tell him but don't rush to tell him now just to feel like you have to tell everyone right this second- but okay.

I agree with Alea. Also, kids might not need to be specifically "told". My husband was never really told that his oldest sister (10 years older then him) is a lesbian, he just grew into knowing it as part of her. I'm not saying it's like that for every kid, but young kids have ways of figuring things out without being told.

That did cross my mind, that he might just see it as a part of his older brother. And Alea, I did misunderstand you but now that it's been clarified for me, I agree. I wouldn't deliberatly seek to hide it, especially if it would become too confusing and difficult for all involved, but I wouldn't go telling him for the sake of saying, "Well, that's it, everyone knows. Good for me."

Right. :) Kids are amazingly open-minded, at least to start with.

Hence Bean's continuous (and astonishing) learning/remembering/analysing abilities .