Dear You 2.0

Wil · Postby **Wil** » Tue Jul 05, 2011 10:45 am

Uh, the only strong female actress you're allowed to cast in Hollywood is this lady right here (Michelle Rodriguez).

VelvetElvis · Postby **VelvetElvis** » Tue Jul 05, 2011 3:27 pm

Rachel Weisz

I love you. I've always said that I'd switch teams for her if she'd give me half a chance.

LilBee91 · Postby **LilBee91** » Tue Jul 05, 2011 3:46 pm

Rachel Weisz
I love you. I've always said that I'd switch teams for her if she'd give me half a chance.

Her and Natalie Portman.

Postby **Eaquae Legit** » Wed Jul 06, 2011 2:59 pm

Dear Gallia melon I am eating right now:

You are delicious. I finally understand why someone might hybridise your varietal. <3

- Me

Postby **Jayelle** » Sat Jul 09, 2011 8:24 am

Dear pweb,

Hi. I think I'm caught up now.

-JL

starlooker · Postby **starlooker** » Sat Jul 09, 2011 8:30 am

*grins very happily*

*Waits for stamp of approval*

steph · Postby **steph** » Sat Jul 09, 2011 8:43 am

Happy to oblige!

Syphon the Sun · Postby **Syphon the Sun** » Sat Jul 09, 2011 10:14 am

Dear pweb,

Hi. I think I'm caught up now.

-JL

Welcome back.

steph · Postby **steph** » Sat Jul 09, 2011 9:36 pm

Dear you,

I'm really glad to have you back as you. Your pterodactyl self is fun, but you are you and I'm glad you decided that it didn't have to be a special time to go back to being you. You are special, and I don't just say that. My kids don't constantly talk about everyone they meet. It's been almost a year and they STILL talk about you on a regular basis. That means you're kinda special and important to my family and me. So yay for defying some more rules of the universe, cuz nothing's gonna bring you (or your post count!) down. Love you.

your favorite mountain girl

Gravity Defier · Postby **Gravity Defier** » Sun Jul 10, 2011 12:27 am

Dear You,

Thank you. I kind of feel like I'm trying to plug a dam with a piece of bubble gum at the moment ("No, no! Really! I'm not quite so pathetic!"), so I don't feel quite so me-like or special, but that is amazingly sweet of you to say. You know I love you and your little pirates, too, very, very much. I also now have Idina Menzel in my head but that's not a complaint.

I'm also a bit bummed I didn't tell Josh that there isn't "always women" because there's only "woman" and that's you. That's right. If I ever trade teams, you're the only woman it'd be worth doing so for.

Love,

Your friendly neighborhood furry person

VelvetElvis · Postby **VelvetElvis** » Sun Jul 10, 2011 9:58 am

Dear general you,

Please, for the love of God, listen to me when I spell my name for you. I am not Ellen. I am not Hellen. It is H-E-L-E-N, which you would know if you listened or weren't a moron. And my last name, I forgave your mistakes with my maiden name, because it's not a common name and neither is it a word in it's own right. But my new name is Dear. D-E-A-R. Like you are writing a letter. Even after I both spell and relate the word to you, you continue to write Deer or Deere. Please just hand the pen to someone more competent if you are going to continue to make those mistakes.

Love,

Ellen Deere.

Postby **Jayelle** » Sun Jul 10, 2011 5:46 pm

Dear Liquor Store,

Thank you for being open until 10.

Dear Bottle of Wine,

Thank you for existing.

Dear Children,

SLEEEEEEEPPPP. You have exhausted me.

-mom/mommy/mama/baaabaaabaaabaaaaaaa

Postby **Eaquae Legit** » Mon Jul 11, 2011 9:55 am

Dear You,

Look, I know you have this huge thing against the people in this house over a tub of ice cream or something. Whatever, that was before I arrived. And I understand being a bit hermit-like.

But good lord, would you please stop putting your smelly garbage can outside your door? Yes, the cleaner will kindly empty it and replace the bag, but you put it out on a Friday afternoon and let it smell up the hallway and bathroom all weekend! And you insist on keeping the doors all shut so the smell is amplified!

You're a big girl (presumably), and you live literally 10 metres from the front door, which has a big old communal bin beside it. Have a little consideration.

steph · Postby **steph** » Mon Jul 11, 2011 1:49 pm

Dear yous,

I'm getting really tired of not being good enough to be a first class friend. We've all been friends for years now and it sucks that I'm still not as good as the rest of you. I'm sorry my husband doesn't have a desk job (it's not his personality to sit and do boring work) so that our schedule is different from everyone else's. I'm sorry that we don't have enough money to go on cruises together like the rest of you. I have made huge efforts to be your friend (like the $200 of theatre tickets I supplied for our girl's night) and if you were TRULY my friend, the schedule and the money wouldn't matter; you'd make efforts to be there for me. But as it stands, you don't make efforts for me, just efforts to participate in what I can do for you, so it's obvious that you don't really know me or value our friendship. So it would seem that there's something about me that you don't like. Is it my emotional vulnerability? If you were to truly know me, you'd know that it's the best feature you can have in a friend, since I will be a true friend to you forever. I'm sorry if that means you occasionally have to deal with some tears. I would think the trade off would be worth it, but apparently not. (And I've had a breakdown around you how many times in the last 5 years? Less than a handful? What a crappy thing to hold against me.) I hope you all have fun together at the swim party that your daughter told my son about (that we're not invited to) and I hope you don't spend the whole time gossiping about what a horrible person I apparently am.

steph, with the big tender heart

fawkes · Postby **fawkes** » Mon Jul 11, 2011 2:24 pm

*hugs Steph* Save your love for your true friends. This person obviously doesn't deserve you.

Gravity Defier · Postby **Gravity Defier** » Mon Jul 11, 2011 2:27 pm

*hugs* What Erica said. You are so beyond "good enough."

mr_thebrain · Postby **mr_thebrain** » Mon Jul 11, 2011 4:36 pm

sounds like a porch is in need of a flaming bag of poop...

steph · Postby **steph** » Mon Jul 11, 2011 4:39 pm

Thanks, guys. Maybe one day I'll find a friend that is as invested in the friendship as I am. Maybe pweb all needs to move here so I can have that.

Petra456 · Postby **Petra456** » Mon Jul 11, 2011 9:50 pm

Dear You,

I miss you, a lot. I feel anti social and blah so much lately that I forget how much fun it is to talk with you. I feel like a horrible friend and I know that the lack of communication is my fault.

Anyways, just wanted to say that you rock, and I miss you.

<3 Twinny

Gravity Defier · Postby **Gravity Defier** » Mon Jul 11, 2011 11:55 pm

Dear You,

That made me turn colors, a bit. Thanks, I miss you, too but for accuracy's sake, I'm pretty anti-social myself and could just as easily reach out but I don't. If it has to be anyone's fault, it's certainly not all yours. You are a great friend. Promise.

But maybe cut back on the blah's. That can't be good for your health.

We'll talk soon and I'm greatly looking forward to it!

<3 Twinny, Two/Too

Postby **Eaquae Legit** » Tue Jul 12, 2011 12:59 pm

Dear You,

No, that was totally insufficient. Apparently you do not understand the distress and inconvenience. If you think I won't pursue this further, you're fooling yourself. I'm already contacting legal counsel.

- Incredibly pissed off

starlooker · Postby **starlooker** » Tue Jul 12, 2011 2:15 pm

Dear You,

I'm sorry. I'm really, really, deeply sorry. We were depending on me right now, and I screwed up in ways that I could have corrected. And now we're in a hell of a bind and it's my fault. And I love you, and you won't let me apologize because you love me and don't see it that way (or, if you do, you are keeping it to yourself). And, still. I'm so deeply sorry. I don't know what's wrong with me. I'll try to do better. I really will.

Love,

Me

Postby **Luet** » Tue Jul 12, 2011 2:31 pm

Dear you,

I'm waiting for a call back from your secretary right now; waiting with tears rolling down my face because I have a terrible feeling she is going to tell me that you said no. No, you won't see me again as a patient. And I really, really need to see you. Or at least, I need to see someone. Because I hate who currently prescribes my meds. She intimidates the crap out of me and I end up telling her that I feel fine, even though I totally do NOT feel fine. Please say yes. And for the love of god, please call back today like you haven't for the past week.

- desperate

steph · Postby **steph** » Tue Jul 12, 2011 3:33 pm

Dear you and you above,

My prayers are with you right now. I love you both.

steph

ETA: Dear you, I just read your other post!! Yay!!! *hug*

Postby **Eaquae Legit** » Sat Jul 16, 2011 12:07 pm

Dear You,

You are an utter incompetent, and I understand the scorn with which my supevisor regards you. It is my distinct pleasure to rip apart 3 pages of the stupidest, shoddiest research ever published in an apparently credible book.

-- A better scholar, even if she's a lot newer

mr_thebrain · Postby **mr_thebrain** » Mon Jul 18, 2011 6:43 pm

you,

look, i realize that a divorce can be messy business. but you're 30 years old. be an adult. i'm accommodating your desires as best as i can without getting screwed, but you can't throw a hissy fit whenever you don't get 100% your way. stop being so childish. this is not the anna show! it's definitely not the josh show, and i don't think it should be.

i think i'm being more than fair giving 100% the money from the sale of the house to your dad. i'm sorry that i'm requiring that it goes directly to him rather than to you to give to him "some time in the future" really? you're crying and yelling and saying that i'm being selfish? REALLY? WHAT f****** CRACK ARE YOU ON?!

i hate that i'm smoking again because of this s***.

-a dissatisfied tenant.

VelvetElvis · Postby **VelvetElvis** » Mon Jul 18, 2011 8:57 pm

Dear Jack,

You are a good friend.

Love always,
An admirer

Gravity Defier · Postby **Gravity Defier** » Tue Jul 19, 2011 12:56 am

*hugs for brain*

VelvetElvis · Postby **VelvetElvis** » Wed Jul 20, 2011 6:53 pm

Dear you,

Just because he is a pit bull, does not mean he is lying in wait to tear out your trachea.

Sincerely,

the people who would just like to be able to walk their dog in peace

Young Val · Postby **Young Val** » Wed Jul 20, 2011 7:54 pm

AMEN.

Both of my dogs have been pitbulls and they are sweethearts.

Petra456 · Postby **Petra456** » Wed Jul 20, 2011 8:00 pm

Dear you,

Just because he is a pit bull, does not mean he is lying in wait to tear out your trachea.

Sincerely,

the people who would just like to be able to walk their dog in peace

This drives me absolutely crazy and breaks my heart. Some of the best dogs i've known have been pits!

powerfulcheese04 · Postby **powerfulcheese04** » Wed Jul 20, 2011 8:14 pm

I don't like the pit prejudice. I don't know why society seems to go through these phases of having a hated breed. It used to be German Shepherds, then it was Dobies, then it was Rotties, now it's Pits... who knows what's next. Bloodhounds? Chows? Back to the GSD?

LilBee91 · Postby **LilBee91** » Wed Jul 20, 2011 8:22 pm

My best friend has a pit bull puppy. They had a hard time finding an apartment because they're on some forbidden pet list or something. He chews everything, but I don't know a puppy that doesn't.

Gravity Defier · Postby **Gravity Defier** » Wed Jul 20, 2011 9:38 pm

You are so f****** stupid sometimes. Honestly. Learn a goddamn lesson every once in a blue moon.

Love,
Yourself

Postby **Eaquae Legit** » Sat Jul 23, 2011 4:35 pm

Dear You (because you might even see this!),

I miss you so much and I wish you were here or I were there and I would totally ask if you wanted to live together and I'd even do the dishes regularly! I really, really miss you - skype sometime soon, perhaps?

Alison

Dear You 2.0

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