Girly Stuff

[locke]

gonna agree with Neo rather than Thomas here. Love is complex, it's not a mystical incomprehensible force. biochemistry. you sounded very Kellhus there, Jason.

[neo-dragon]

Now in, boy, and don't even think of coming out until you are ready to apologize for that second bit.

Ohhhh, come on! Don't make me do it in front of the other boys, they'll think I'm whipped.

[elfprince13]

Is it safe to assume everyone here has seen this? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SecVCh9dg4I

Also, neo, none of the teachings of any major world religion, with the possible exception of certain strains of Buddhism, make any sense if humans are just biomechanical computers. For starters, there's no longer any basis for morality, and certainly none of the teachings about any sort of after-life make sense.

[powerfulcheese04]

There are parts of your brain that light up in fMRI when looking at a picture of a romantic partner that do not light up when looking at a picture of a close friend or non-romantic loved one.

(I LOVE the Discovery Special "The Science of Sex." Really, if it comes on, you should watch it.)

[Jayelle]

*waves Mod wand*
The last several posts have been split into the religion forum.

[shadow-petra]

Praise Jayelle the Magical Wizard!...Witch!

[Jebus]

Hello ladies, completely hypothetical situation here:

If some guy you'd been having casual sex with for the past couple of months mentioned one time that he was experiencing symptoms which suggested he had had sex with someone with thrush would you be offended and avoid this guy bcause of the implication? In this hypothetical situation you do not, in fact, have thrush.

[Luet]

Well, I'm a little confused. When you say thrush, do you mean a general yeast infection or specific to the mouth (which is what I usually think of when I hear thrush)? Alos, there are many causes of yeast infections that are not from sexual transmission. Women often get them from taking antibiotics.

And when you say "avoid this guy", do you mean "not have sex"? I think if a person, male or female, is diagnosed with a yeast infection it is best to avoid sexual activity while being treated to avoid infecting anyone else.

[Jebus]

Ok, ok, I'll admit it, it's not hpothetical. I always relate thrush to the inbetween the legs area. Anyway, I got signs on me cock that developed right after having sex with this girl that internet searches suggested were the result of having sex with someone with thrush, and a doctor thinks that's probably what it was. Whether it is or isn't that isn't the issue really, just wondering if a girl would be extremely put-off by the situation, assuming she doesn't actually have thrush and wasn't responsible

[starlooker]

Depends on if she relates you having thrush with you having sex with someone else and if that offends her.

But having the infection itself wouldn't utterly gross me out. And, personally, I'd be much less put off by a guy who told me he had thrush and thus couldn't have sex due to getting treated for it vs. a guy who didn't say anything, had sex with me, and then was like, "Oh, yeah, by the way..." after I got infected.

[Luet]

But having the infection itself wouldn't utterly gross me out. And, personally, I'd be much less put off by a guy who told me he had thrush and thus couldn't have sex due to getting treated for it vs. a guy who didn't say anything, had sex with me, and then was like, "Oh, yeah, by the way..." after I got infected.

This.

Don't infect anyone else, get treated, all will be well.

[Jebus]

Ok, well I guess that's good, then. f****** thrush man, I thought only women got that.

[Luet]

You know it's the same thing as jock itch and athlete's foot, right? All just yeast infections.

[powerfulcheese04]

Interesting... I have never heard that called thrush before.

Thrush, to me, is a candidiasis infection in the mouth that is normal in infants and a sign of immune comprimise in adults.

Yeast infections can happen anywhere that's relatively hospitible-- close, warm, moist-- so things like feet/toes, the inguinal area (so, like, that fold between your legs and your genitals), the vagina, skin folds in the really obese. Women frequently get yeast infections because of being on antibiotics because it disturbs the normal flora and allows the yeast to overgrow.

[Luet]

Yeah, that's how I've heard the term used too but it might be different in the UK.

[Young Val]

Just got back from my gyn appointment (appointment at 11:15, I showed up at 10:45 to get all the paper work out of the way, and the doctor couldn't see me until 12:30!!!! I was not pleased!)

Anyway, I finally got a prescription for a birth control pill, something I've been meaning to do for about two years. It's for Loestrin 24 Fe, a brand I've never been on before. There's some promotion going on now which means it's only $24 a month, which I'm excited about. I have a feeling after chatting with my Dr. that this is going to be a good brand for me, but we're giving it a three month trial run, and then we'll switch to something else if I'm unhappy with it. Has anyone had any experience with this brand? What brand do you use? Any side effects?

[Luet]

Yeah, waiting for doctors sucks. But I'm glad you got bcps and I hope it works out for you. I have tried 6-7 different kinds over the years to try and help my endometriosis and none have worked. So, I have given up on them. I never tried Loestrin. I have found this site so incredibly helpful in comparing bcps and choosing a different one if your current one isn't working well:

http://www.wdxcyber.com/ncontr13.htm

Let me know if you have any other questions!

[Petra456]

I've been on ortho cyclen for just under two years now and i've had no side effects. It's nice, I only end up paying $27 for a three month supply.

[Jayelle]

Finally got a chance to use my size 2 DivaCup. (sidenote: after a year and a half, I did NOT miss my period). It works well. I still endorse it highly, but I am sorry to the annoymous person who posted awhile back about hating it at first - it was so helpful to me to have a supportive group of friends who all dived into this together.

[Luet]

Do you find you actually need the size 2? I know some people still use the size 1 even after childbirth. Did you try the size 1 to see how it was after Ginny?

[Jayelle]

I think I actually needed the size 2 before Ginny, but didn't want the expense, so I waited. It's better now that I have it.

[Luet]

I'm very happy with my small and large LadyCups. I use the large for heavier days and the small for lighter ones. I think the size/fit isn't as important with the LadyCup because it is so soft and flexible so it conforms very well to you.

My period was a couple days late this month (which is very rare for me) and the cup is so handy for when you are waiting for it to start. If you tried to do that with a tampon and your period does NOT start, it is horrible to pull it out dry.

[Young Val]

I am an emotional WRECK lately.

As I mentioned up thread I'm back on the pill (really this is the first time I'll be on it for any extended period of time. Every other time I went on it it was only for a very short span) and I don't know if that's to blame for my emotional hell lately, or not.

I started this first pack the first day of my period (on my doctor's suggestion, I really would have preferred to wait and time it more to my liking, but she felt strongly I should start it on my period so I did) which was last Thursday. Technically I think I started spotting some time Wednesday night but my prescription wasn't ready then. Anyway, my periods are fairly regular (with this exception of last summer when I just... didn't get my period... for almost three months... for no discernible reason) but this time it came over a week early. Great. SO ANYWAY (god I'm digressing a lot today) I started my pill pack on Thursday, and have been taking the pill at the same time every day since then. Normally my period lasts three days with one last day of light spotting. Four days total. It's usually really heavy.

So far I am ON DAY EIGHT. THIS IS NOT FUN. Yesterday I was spotting so I thought it was FINALLY over, but NO! I woke up this morning and I was back to having a full-on period.

Lately I have been

1. super stressed out
2. drastically adjusting my eating habits (what I eat, when I eat, all that. I go for a few days being healthy and then totally fall of the wagon, rinse, repeat).
3. starting the pill, which of course is screwing with my hormone levels and my body will need some time to adjust.

these are all things that probably have a lot to do with why I'm currently starring in Kelly And The Everlasting Period, and I gotta say, whether it's the placebo effect or not, my cramps are now almost non-existent, which is awesome, BUT I AM TIRED OF BLEEDING AND CRYING AT EVERYTHING.

I am mostly just venting. I know nothing is wrong, I'm just super frustrated. The emotional roller coaster has been off the charts this week. See, I'm mixing metaphors. That's how bad it is.

I just want to not feel like s*** anymore.

[Luet]

Aww, I'm so sorry. All I can say is give it three cycles to even out. If you aren't happy with how you are feeling at that point then see your dr about trying a different pill. *hugs*

[Young Val]

I was going to put this in Confessions, but figured it was too "Girly."

I keep thinking I can WILL my period to stop. I know. Crazy, right? Doesn't stop me from trying to do it. Then, when I go to check and see that my period is still definitely there and shows no signs of stopping any time soon, I burst into tears.

This has happened three times so far today.

[starlooker]

Call the doctor or your doctor's nurse prac or PA. Seriously. See if they can switch you to something else. I had a friend who this happened to, exact same symptoms, and they ended up switching her to something much easier on her system. At any rate, it can't hurt to check with them as to if this is normal with this drug and how long you can expect it to last.

ETA And make sure you tell them about the emotional stuff, too.

[Young Val]

It's over! It's over! Hooray! It's over!

My emotions are much steadier, now, too.

So much relief!

[Gravity Defier]

[rambling]

I don't tend to get along with other girls for long, the only exceptions I can think of being Fred, who is just too darn carefree and happy to enable me to have drama with her, and my longtime friend here, who curtails drama by repeatedly telling me she doesn't like emotions so if I'm having strong ones of any sort (happiness, sadness, anger, whatever),find a way to deal with them before I'm around her. Fred and I hardly talk anymore (:() and this person here, well, I avoid her because I can't be my emotional-self around her and if I can't be myself with my so-called friends, what the hell are they there for and why do I want to be around them? I have family and strangers to be quiet and composed around.

But every so often, I miss having a girl's input or having one for comfort because try as I might to tell boys I don't want my problems fixed, I just want them to understand, repeatedly if necessary, what my issue is, they keep trying to tell me what my "real" problem is and how I can go about fixing it, outlining plans and distractions. Sometimes it really is so simple that I'd be a dumbass not to listen but mostly it's not so simple. And they seem to think I shouldn't be feeling one way or the other and if I thought about it like they did, it'd make perfect sense to me, too, but that's just it: feelings are not rational or based on reason, so when I feel a certain way and boys tell me to stop feeling that way because it's all in my head or there's no reason, it's like they're saying I'm dumb for feeling the way I do and I must be feeling that way on purpose because I like it.

So for times when I'm an even bigger nutcase than usual, like this past week when I cried over Full House or over the fact that once I called my brother, mom and dad, I had no one I could call to celebrate my good news with, it all had to be done through text, I want a girl around to not tell me "Oh, it must be that time of the month!" but instead "It's okay, I understand."




Also, I want a girl to talk to about boys, rather "a" boy, because heaven forbid I try talking to a guy about that. I get annoying things like the truth and who the hell wants that? [/rambling]

[Young Val]

One of the BEST parts about having girl friends is gushing about boys!

That said, I struggle a lot of with my female friendships, too. Bizarrely, I now have far more female friends than male friends--something I'd never have believed a few years ago) but I'm only very close with a rare few. I suppose it's something I'm learning.

[Petra456]

I don't tend to get along with other girls for long, the only exceptions I can think of being Fred, who is just too darn carefree and happy to enable me to have drama with her ... Fred and I hardly talk anymore (:()

The first part made me happy because I really don't like having drama with other people, and I really can't think of a whole lot of people I do have drama with, if any. The second part made me really really sad because I miss you!

I honestly don't know why we don't talk more, I even have Will sitting here every other day saying "you should call Alea". I guess it's the whole phone shyness (that I know you can relate to). I'm horrible with starting conversations. I'm also always afraid you're busy or not in a talking mood. Either way, those are really not good excuses and we should talk more, especially if you've got girly stuff or any stuff you want to talk, giggle, rant, gush, or yell about.

I'm also one to not have a lot of girl friends. There are very few girls I can stand to talk to or be around for long periods of time. Growing up I was friends with guys. I mean, growing up my best friend was a guy, and he had to listen to me rant about girl stuff.

[Eaquae Legit]

I think the male half of the species generally needs to have this song memorised.

Cry If You Want To - Paul Brandt

Cry if you want to
I won't tell you not to
I won't try to cheer you up
I'll just be here if you want me

There's no use in keeping a stiff upper lip
You can weep, you can sleep, you can loosen your grip
You can frown, you can drown, and go down with the ship
You can cry if you want you

Don't ever apologize venting your pain
It's something to me you don't need to explain
I don't need to know why, I don't think it's insane
You can cry if you want to

The windows are closed, the neighbours aren't home
If it's better with me then to do it alone
I'll draw all the curtains and unplug the phone
You can cry if you want to

You can stare at the ceiling, tear at your hair
Swallow your feelings and stagger and swear
You can show things and throw things and I wouldn't care
You can cry if you want to

No I won't make fun of you I won't tell anyone
I won't analyze what you do or you should have done
I won't advise you to go and have fun
You can cry if you want to

When it's empty, and ugly, and terribly sad
I can't feel what you feel but I know it feels bad
I know that it's real and it makes you so mad
You can cry

Cry if you want to
I won't tell you not to
I won't try to cheer you up
I'll just be here if you want me
to be
near you

Guys, this IS the appropriate response. If, and ONLY if, she wants your advice on how to fix it, then you may give it. But generally she is smart enough to fix it on her own, and she just needs you to be there.

[Jebus]

Pfff, when was the last time a woman refrained from opining on how to fix someone's personal problem? Never.

[locke]

yes but my response is to fix things not to bear them out with mhms and non-investigative related responses. Find the problem, fix it, move on. sort of hardwired into my genes.

That said, I've plenty of my own problems I wallow in, and even know how to fix and yet I rarely go about implementing the solutions. So I'm pretty much a hypocrite and useless in any regard.

[Petra456]

Find the problem, fix it, move on.

Ah, I wish things were that easy!

[Gravity Defier]

I guess it's the whole phone shyness (that I know you can relate to). ...I'm also always afraid you're busy or not in a talking mood.

Yes, to the shyness and the last part is really my fault, no doubt about it. My already present shyness + slight fear of bugging person on the other end became a full blown phobia last year thanks to April's occurrences and only started to get better in December. I'm proud to say I will answer unrecognized numbers again, mostly quit screening recognized numbers, and will use the phone, in general, with ease. We must talk soon.


Ali, good song. I completely agree with what you said at the bottom there.