When you think Novinha is crazy and you ponder better companionship choices for Ender.
crazy. But I sort of resent people thinking that makes her undeserving of Ender.
Why do you suppose that from any amount of women that Ender was in contact with he decided to marry Novinha? why not Alessandra? Perhaps it was because he wanted permanent ties to Listuiania? I dont feel that there connection was "Love" it was purely business concerning the colony.
For starters, Ender was a teenager when he met Alessandra and in my opinion, not ready for marriage or likely even a typical teenage relationship at that point. He wasn't a typical teenager in any way, shape, or form and to expect him to fall in love with one of the first non-Battle School females he spends some not insignificant time with is kind of far-fetched. Not only because he had just gotten out of military school where he grew up for all intents and purposes, not only because he just got out of a war, but because he just put himself one step away from entirely wiping out a whole species and
killed two kids as part of the process.
To put it lightly, he was no God, no infallible hero...he was just as fucked up in the head as Novinha, only he had thousands of years, thanks to technology, to reconcile his demons as best as he could and deal with what he couldn't until the Hive Queen was back. She was his first priority, the woman in his life so to speak, which makes it hard to devote yourself to someone else.
I imagine meeting Novinha was a lot like meeting a kindred spirit, someone who was no more broken than he was and just as intelligent, if not moreso in her own area of expertise. It is entirely possible that he saw the chance for her to help him as much as he thought he could help her; you know, birds of a feather...two tortured souls, both carrying the weight of their own worlds on their shoulders, and yet able to connect. It is entirely plausible in my mind that they could and would fall in love.