Real-life Speakers?

[Bryan Christopher Sawyer]

I think it's worth mentioning that the Speakers don't tell every dirty little secret. An important part of speaking is that it isn't done for the dead, it's done for the living, to help them reconcile some feelings toward the dead, close the books on some chapters of their own lives, and ultimately to give closure to those who'se lives were affected, for better or worse, by the dead.

It doesn't involve telling about all or even most of that person's mistakes. Just explaining the flaws in their character, weighing it against their virtues to show the measure of the person, and how those at the speaking can understand this to make their own lives better.

That's the purpose of a speaking. I think the one group that would like this the most is the politically organized Skeptics. Like the ones who are members of Skeptic societies. Speaking is secular, but with all the feeling of sacredness you might get from a religious service, and skeptics often engage in that sort of thing, even forming groups that are tax exempt.

I'm a skeptic myself, though not very politically active. I'm a conservative and I'm alright with my money saying that we're one nation under God, even if I don't believe in the supernatural.

But my father was a minister. So was his father. Protestants, mind you. I come from a family of WASPs. My father used to tell me about the approach he'd use with different families, some who were believers, others who weren't. In one case he was asked to do a funeral for an unidentified woman in central Pennsylvania, but finally the woman was identified and the family took charge of all that - they had a funeral in her home town with their family minister.

Having an insider's view of how someone deals with the dead who were known to have flaws is important to a minister in any religion, and their aim is to be discreet and ultimately to help the family and friends.

I think I could probably do a speaking. I wonder about who would ask for one. That's the real question. The idea that it would degenerate into digging for dirt is just silly. Because it rarely does now, when similar ceremonies take place.