These are the most efficient ways to annoy a ...

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Janus%TheDoorman
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Postby Janus%TheDoorman » Sun Aug 19, 2007 6:46 pm

...kung fu student

1) Go ahead. Say Grasshopper. SAY IT!

2) Make "the noises" and wave your arms around. Lift your leg a wiggle it if you wanna make yourself look silly while you're doing it.

3) Bow. Ninety-nine times out of a hundred, you're doing it wrong, and it's rather awkward.

4) Ask me to break a board, or ask if I can break a board and then demand I prove it, becuase I'm supposed to carry boards around to impress people like you.

5) Ask if I can kick *this* high.
"But at any rate, the point is that God is what nobody admits to being, and everybody really is."
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Postby Borommakot_15 » Mon Sep 03, 2007 7:47 am

...a 6C0X1 contract writer.

Fail to understand that "Poor planning and/or laziness on YOUR part does NOT constitute an emergency on MY part." These things take time. Federal law often dictates that they take at least certain amounts of time, and no amount of calling me, e-mailing me, or threatening to talk to my boss is going to change that. You want it done sooner, get it to me sooner.
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Postby Xenofreak » Fri Sep 14, 2007 2:53 am

A soldier in the U.S. Military
1)Try to guess my political views.
2)Ask me my political views as a soldier.
3)Tell me why what the military is doing in X country is wrong.
4)Tell me whats wrong with this country's administration. (Run for office yourself)
5)Call me stupid for enlisting and ask me if i want to die.
6)Assume i like to kill people.
7)Take for granted your rights, or exploit your rights to the point where you can be considered lazy or a criminal

1-4 usually only apply when I'm in uniform. I love to talk politics when in a civilian setting, unless i don't like you. Then i wont talk to you at all :) .

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Postby neo-dragon » Thu Sep 20, 2007 5:06 pm

The Most Efficient Ways to Annoy a Teacher:

1. Refuse to do any work all year long and repeatedly, and loudly, complain about failing. In fact, just the sitting like a lump in a log is enough to irritate.

2. Lie to your parents about something your teacher said or did to get out of trouble.

3. Wait until the day or two before grades are due to ask, "What can I do to improve my grade?"

4. Take instructions literally, e.g. "Take a seat" followed by the smartass grabbing their desk and starting to walk out with it.

5. Scream in the hallway over any little thing.

6. Show up late for no good reason.

7. Complain that you'll never need this subject in life.

8. Tell you, quite matter of factly, that "I'd learn if you'd teach!"

9. Act as though you know everything and have nothing left to learn.

10. Act surprised when caught very obviously doing something or saying something that shouldn't have been done or said. "Like, whoa-my-god, you're not deaf, dumb and blind?!"
I think I can add a few to this list.

11. After three weeks of classes, still calling your teacher by the wrong name. I've successfully learned the names of nearly 70 students, how hard is it to remember mine when you only have 4 teachers each semester?

12. Asking "do we have to write this?" every time I begin putting something on the blackboard. I get this one at least once a day, and I respond exactly the same way each time: "You don't have to copy anything I put on the board, but I'm not putting it there for my health."
(actually, even other students are starting to get annoyed by this one. They've actually started giving the standard response for me).

13. Try to negotiate when I tell you flat out to do/not do something. Where exactly do teenagers get the idea that they can bargain with teachers from a position of an equal?

14. Complain about how unfair and/or "gay" it is when I refuse to negotiate.

15. When I say that I haven't had a chance to grade something yet, respond by saying, "why not? That's your job!"

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Postby Eddie Pinz » Fri Oct 05, 2007 2:09 pm

How to annoy restaurant workers:

1. Let me walk you all the way to your table, then ask for a booth.

2. Pick exactly where you want to sit. It really isn't my job as a host to control the flow of the tables in the restaurant.

3. Get mad when I tell you the section is closed. You really can sit there all you want, but no one will be there to wait on you.

4. Tell me you were waiting on the phone for ten minutes, when you already hung up and called back by the time I walked from the front up to the bar.

5. Get mad when I tell you there is an hour wait.

6. Continue to ask me every five minutes how much longer it is going to be.

7. "Hi how are we doing today/tonight?"
Acceptable:
Say how you are doing, then ask how I am in reuturn.
Rude:
Say how you are doing, without asking how I am.
Completely ignore me.
Unaccaptable:
"I want <insert drink>"
"I want <insert meal>"
"It's cold/hot in here."

8. When I ask you if you would like a drink, say "No thanks, I just have a water" WATER IS A FREAKING DRINK!!!

9. Say you'll have a water for now, when we both know your cheap ass doesn't want to pay for a drink. If you want to drink water that is fine, but don't make it seem like you are going to get something that actually costs money when we both know your not."

10. Ask me if I'm new here when it takes me a while to get your drinks out, because there is 16 of you and I only have two hands.

11. Act like you are the only table I have.

12. Yell something to me when I am talking to another table.

13. Follow me into the kitchen.

14. Pay a 40 dollar check with a hundred dollar bill like you are a big shot, then leave a 5% tip.

15. Start giving me your order, when I am clearly not your waiter.

16. Say that you are ready then have no idea what you want.

17. Get mad a me when I don't speak <insert foriegn language>, I'm sorry it was not a requirement for the job.

18. Complain when it costs a dollar extra to get a more expensive side item. It's only a dollar.

19. Ask me for a box and then don't take your food home.

20. Sit in my section for an hour after you are done eating. Thank you for costing me money.

21. Get a fruity frozen drink and then complain that there is no alcohol in it. The drink is supposed to be made so you don't really taste the alcohol.

22. Call me a liar when I tell you that I made the drink and I poured alcohol in there.

23. Complain when you get chared for wanting extra alcohol, it's not free you know.

24. Complain that it is too strong when I pour the alcohol directly down the straw to ensure that you can definitely taste it on the first sip.

25. Get mad at me for not serving you when you don't have an ID, then ID you have is clearly a fake(I should know, I had one), or your ID is cracked in someway. I'm sorry it is not worth losing my job just so you can get drunk.

26. Get mad when I catch you trying to walk out on the check.

27. Stiff me on said check.

28. Complain about gatuity because you don't want to leave a tip.

29. Get mad at me when your credit card gets declined, that's not my fault.

30. Eat over half your meal, then complain it was not cooked right and expect not to pay for it.

31. Expect to use 18 coupons when it clearly states on said coupon that you can use one per table.

32. Get your bill comped and then don't leave a tip. I really am sorry that the food came out wrong or took a very long time, but I didn't cook it. You aren't paying for anything at least you can tip when I didn't do anything wrong.

33. Complain that the food here sucks, but continue to come in at least once a week.

34. Claim I am racist. Thanks for the offer but I don't think so.

35. Try to tell me that we used to have this item, when I clearly know it is from another local restaurant. Then call me a liar. I love that.


I know have more too. As you can tell I was in that industry for quite a while and I have a little built up anger because of it. But just a general rule of thumb to all of you that have not been in the business, don't mess with people that serve your food because we always have the last laugh. ALWAYS.

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Postby Luet » Fri Oct 05, 2007 5:18 pm

How to annoy restaurant workers:

19. Ask me for a box and then don't take your food home.

20. Sit in my section for an hour after you are done eating. Thank you for costing me money.
Your list is really good. I waitressed for about 3 years, during high school at a family resaturant and afterwards at an upscale place. My husband waitered and catered for a loooong time (8 years?)...so we are totally sympathetic to all those in the service industry.

But I had to respond to the two above. I almost always take leftovers home and I almost always remember them, but once in a great while I forget them. It actually happened at Olive Garden this past weekend and I was so upset when we realized it, I wanted to go back. We both had only eaten like a quarter of our meals and I would have had at least two more meals out of it. So, sometimes it is just a pure accident.

As to no. 20, there are occasions when people want to sit and talk for a long time after eating for a variety of reasons. Now, if the place is packed and there is a huge line waiting or something it is good to be courteous and move the conversation to a Starbucks or home...but otherwise, I don't have a problem with sitting there as long as you leave a big tip.

As far as tipping goes, my base starts at 20% if it's an average experience. If it was bad, it could go down from there but not below 15%; extra good goes up from 20%. And if it's a cheap breakfast at Denny's or something, I'll never leave less than $3 or so, no matter the percent.
"In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer." - Albert Camus in Return to Tipasa

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Postby Eaquae Legit » Fri Oct 05, 2007 9:29 pm

Ways to Annoy a Cyclist:

1. Be another cyclist and don't wear a helmet. Or bike at night with no reflectors/lights. Or ride on the wrong side of the road. Or generally do stupid, stupid things that make drivers angry at cyclists as a whole. If I can manage to be conscientious, so can you.

2. Honk or catcall. It startles, and it's very, very dangerous to be a startled cyclist, especially on the road. And it's creepy. And vulgar.

3. Refuse to move your danged car halfway into the perpetually empty turning lane and give me room to bike without fear.

4. Pretend I don't exist or that I don't have the same road rights (and responsibilities) as an auto. That means you wait till I go through the intersection before you turn.

5. Sit in the seats reserved for cyclists and their bikes on the train. And look at me blankly when I get on the train.
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Postby Noodle » Fri Oct 12, 2007 11:12 pm

Ways to annoy a computer tech:

1) Tell me there was an error message, but you don't have a clue what it said.

2) Tell me there was an error message, and make up some random error message that can't possibly exist.

3) Argue with me on my diagnosis. I'm the trained professional, you called ME remember?

4) Send me an email saying that you can't get on the internet.

5) Ask me why I didn't get the email from #4.

6) Assume that you are my only client, act upset or whine when I am unable to immediately respond to your problem.

7) Assume that your pathetic description of your problem is sufficient for me to be able to walk you through fixing the problem over the phone.

8) Expect that I'll walk you through a procedure over the phone for free.

9) Hang up on me when I tell you that there are too many variables for me to diagnose the problem over the phone.

10) Complain that my rates are too high. Obviously they aren't too high if I'm booked solid for at least a week.

11) Treat me as if my evenings and weekends are worthless. Demand that I work late so you don't have to take a 5 minute break while I reboot your server.

12) Ask me to fix something on your computer and then sit in your chair in front of the keyboard while I try to lean over you and figure out your elaborate problem.

13) Ask me to fix something on your computer and then sit in your chair and grab the mouse and expect me to tell you from memory every single click required to do a complex procedure. Act very annoyed when I don't get the procedure exactly right.

14) When I'm helping you over the phone and ask you to do a lengthy procedure like reboot your computer, don't give me a status report. Just sit on the other end of the phone waiting for me to telepathically know that the computer is back up.

15) Assume that since I'm a paid computer tech, I know everything there is to know about every single piece of software ever written, ESPECIALLY the custom software that your friend's brother's nephew wrote for you.
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Postby Eddie Pinz » Mon Oct 15, 2007 7:54 am

How to annoy restaurant workers:

19. Ask me for a box and then don't take your food home.

20. Sit in my section for an hour after you are done eating. Thank you for costing me money.
But I had to respond to the two above. I almost always take leftovers home and I almost always remember them, but once in a great while I forget them. It actually happened at Olive Garden this past weekend and I was so upset when we realized it, I wanted to go back. We both had only eaten like a quarter of our meals and I would have had at least two more meals out of it. So, sometimes it is just a pure accident.

As to no. 20, there are occasions when people want to sit and talk for a long time after eating for a variety of reasons. Now, if the place is packed and there is a huge line waiting or something it is good to be courteous and move the conversation to a Starbucks or home...but otherwise, I don't have a problem with sitting there as long as you leave a big tip.

As far as tipping goes, my base starts at 20% if it's an average experience. If it was bad, it could go down from there but not below 15%; extra good goes up from 20%. And if it's a cheap breakfast at Denny's or something, I'll never leave less than $3 or so, no matter the percent.
For the leftovers, I understand that it is an accident sometimes, but it doesn't make it any less annoying. Especailly if you go out of your way to ask me for a box when I'm busy with something else. I also hate when people come back over an hour later and expect that you still have their box of leftovers sitting around.

I find sitting around and taking up a table is inconsiderate, even if the restaurant isn't packed. For example, I have a three table section. One is being taken up by people sitting. Let's say 2 hours, 1 actually eating the meal and the other sitting and talking. Now in that time, my other two tables fill up. Now during the week not all the sections in the restaurant are open, so it appears that there are plenty of open tables. It is my turn to get another table, but there are no tables in my section so the table goes to someone else. Now, if the table wants to tip me double because they are taking twice as much time as a normal table that is fine, but that doens't normally happen. And I guess some of my anger goes to the hosts, who could have easily sat me in a closed section and I would have picked the table up. And some goes to the management for setting table limits low, even when they know some servers can hadle it. Now, I understand that people like to sit and talk and don't liked to be rushed. But I feel most people don't understand that sitting there costs the server money.

As for tipping, I generally feel the same way as you. 20% is my start. Usually anyone who waits on me will get at least 20%. Once in a blue moon, I will drop down to 15%. But you really have to try to get this tip. I mean I'm easy going. I understand if your slow. I understand if you mess something up because your busy or even just plain forgot something. I understand if something comes out of the kitchen wrong. These things happen. You basically have to ignore me for the entire meal for me to give you 15%. Now, if I have a very good experience, I have no problem overtipping. There is no better way to restore a server's faith in humanity than giving them a tip that they just weren't expecting. As for the cheap breakfest, I always try to leave at least $5. And I always try to overtip server's working at diners because I feel that they put up with more s*** and make less money than other servers.


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