Philotic Web

Dear You,

This is what you posted on facebook:

I was at Safeway and saw a young guy picking out small bunches of flowers. One of them was red carnations and I desperately wanted to save him from impending doom. I didn't know if he'd appreciate my advice, so I'll just hand it out to the rest of you. NO CARNATIONS unless you want a swift break-up or the doghouse treatment.

This is what I really, really want to post in response, but since I don't know you well and and don't think it would help I'm biting my tongue:

What a bitchy thing to say. Maybe some women (or men, for that matter) just like getting flowers! Getting the "wrong kind" of flowers is enough to send your S.O to the doghouse or BREAK UP WITH THEM? W.T.F. This is why men think all women are crazy. Flowers are a nice thing to do, who the f*** cares if they're carnations? You make my blood boil. What a ridiculously selfish attitude. A gift is a GIFT, accept it and be gracious.

From, the best friend of your sister-in-law

I love getting any type of flowers! Carnations remind me of when I was in Elementary school and we would give them to our parents at the end of the year ceremony as a thank you. They make me smile, and I would never EVER be upset if anyone gave me a carnation.

Dear you,

I am so frustrated. You have repeatedly shown me that my friendship is not important to you, despite all my effort to show you how important of a person you are. You have show ZERO interest in my life for 2 years or more, even though I bent over backward to be there for you. You haven't even talked to me in 6 months. But then I hear from you when you suddenly see how I can benefit you.

I don't need your advice. I've been knowledgeable about this topic for at least 10 years. Your interest in the topic has been for less than 2 months. I'm glad it's changed your life, but I'm not going to do anything involving you. I don't need you in my life and I don't want your nose in my business. I'm buying things elsewhere and I'm going to support the friend that has been around, who knows what's going on in my life and has been here to support me through my trials. You don't even know what trials I've had, so I don't know why you think it's ok to make a contrived, panicked phone call when you think you could make some money off of me and you're afraid I'll use it somewhere else.

You have done nothing but bring me down for years under the guise of "being supportive" and "making me feel better" and being my "best friend." In reality, you manipulated me, twisted my feelings and intentions to make ME the one with the problem. Well, the longer you've been gone, the more I realize that I'm not the problem. I'm happier without your lies and manipulations. I'm done.

Me, aka Steph, aka your "best friend"

Possibly ignorant male question.... what's wrong with carnations? Is there some reason you're not "supposed" to get someone carnations, or does that one specific person just not like them or something?

A lot of women consider carnations to be very cheap flowers and they kinda have a stigma of being "unacceptable" if they're being given to a women. Personally, I think women should just appreciate what they given...

Dear You,

I miss you. A lot. More than I can express.

I knew that having you more than a thousand miles away was going to be hard. I didn't know it was going to be this hard.

Also, I'm sad. Just sad. That hard to get out of bed in the morning kind of sad.

I know I get to see you soon. 3 weeks isn't that far away when we've already done 7 apart. But it seems so long. And after that, it's another 7 weeks. It's just so hard.

I mean, I knew that being with you on the weekends is what made vet school bearable all along. But without you here, without seeing you to look forward to, I'm lonely.

Granted, it also doesn't help that my best friend who lives here has been out of town for the last 2 weeks. So, I miss her too. But, mostly, I miss you.

Love,
Your wife

Dear You,

After looking at your latest Tumblr offerings, my husband and I have decided we cannot show them to Atticus. Otherwise, he will develop a total infatuation and insist on us selling all our worldly goods to fly across the pond so he might meet this beautiful damsel.

Sincerely,

Auntie/Mommy

Dear You,

That was an absolutely terrible idea. What were you thinking? You completely deserved what you got..

~Yourself

Dear You,

Keep it up and you will soon be known as The Little Boy Who Cried Boobie.

Love,
Mom

Sounds pretty normal, starlooker.

Dear You,

High school was 11 years ago (holy crap, seriously?!) and I honestly don't remember us being particularly close then. I know for damn sure we weren't close after high school; I can count on one hand who it was I stayed close to and still have enough fingers left to flip someone off, consider wearing an engagement ring, and pinky swear to something. I'm not one of those people that needs to inflate their friend list/count on social media, either. If someone is on my list, or vice versa, it is because we are friends, were really good friends at some point in the past, or have interest in being friends and need a place to start. No offense but we're not, we weren't, and I don't. High school is not something I want more reminders of.

Sincerely,
Someone whose name you apparently recognize

Dear You,

Watching you build a life without me hurts.

Dear You,

Ben Folds Five said it best:

Did you get my other letter?
Sometimes I think I ought to call...
Cause, you know, I often wonder
if you open them at all.
Every couple nights or so
You know, you pop into my dreams.
I just can't get rid of you
like you got rid of me.
Oh, but I send my best
cause, god knows, you've seen my worst.

I miss you, damnit. Every time you text me my heart breaks a little, because I know that's all that's left anymore. You were my friend like no one else has ever been. And even though it's impossible, I still oftentimes want all of that back.

Dear You,

I am really happy you got the eff out of AZ.

...now if we could just get all other women out too.

http://jezebel.com/5893011/law-will-all ... -baby-pill

What.

The.

f***.

This is what happens when you insist that insurance be tied to employment. Here's an idea: get rid of employer-sponsored insurance, give the tax benefits to the individual, and let that compensation be paid as wages, instead.

I could tailor a plan that meets my needs, instead of my employer's or my employment pool's. I could pick the plan that I really want and get a raise, because my plan would be cheaper than the group plan, even after maxing out my HSA deposits. I could take my plan from job to job. And I wouldn't be punished by the IRS for not buying through my employer.

This is what happens when you insist that insurance be tied to employment.

Really? That's your response?

It's not entirely unreasonable, I guess.



I guess my response isn't that great, either. It vacillated between "*sad, resigned sigh*," "Let's see them propose the same for Viagra or other ED pill users" and "This from the party that claims to want less intrusion on their lives from bigger entities."

They just let any ol' crazy propose legislation, don't they?

Well, at least it won't pass, right? There can't be that many crazies in one state...

Really? That's your response?

Pretty much.

I can see where they're coming from, at least. Religious employers don't want to pay for something they disagree with for religious reasons. For some, that's birth control. I get that. And I get that some of those employers are willing to pay for it if it's used for other medical reasons (because, to them, the pills themselves aren't "bad," only the use of them for birth control purposes). So this lets them distinguish based on intended use. The alternative for them is to not pay for it at all, even when it's used for non-birth-control purposes. This is, in a way, a compromise for them. I'd expect to see the same thing for elective abortions vs. life-saving abortions for some employers.

But the heart of the problem is that the employer is intertwined at all. I don't want my employer involved in my health care choices. I'd wager that most people probably feel the same way. But to ever get there, we're going to have to decouple insurance from employment.

Oi, Arizona... I'm really baffled how the government thought it'd be easier to get every company to fund healthcare instead of just funding it themselves through taxes. It'd at least cut out the issue of people whining about what they have to include in a plan and defending it with some cobbled definition of freedom.

So I was just thinking about all of this and I do see Syphon's point. Yes, it initially strikes me as crazy legislation, but I would be equally appalled by a bill allowing doctors to be fired for not performing abortions they were morally opposed to performing. It seems like an easier and less invasive solution would be for employers opposed to the use of contraceptive birth control to find an insurance plan that didn't cover it. I don't know if there are really any plans like that that exist, or if employers really have a ton of choice in what insurance policies they can choose from, but it would allow them to feel morally satisfied without firing the women who get additional coverage for birth control or pay for it out of pocket. Horribly inconvenient for said women, mind, but at least it wouldn't be such an outright invasion of privacy. I'm not saying I would necessarily support such a plan, but it could potentially be an option. I dunno--just my random thoughts. I've never actually dealt with health insurance issues (yay for being covered by my parents!), so if this is a terribly ignorant idea, let me know.

I just think he's being naive to say that it's as simple as separating insurance from employment. There are attempts right now, all over the country, to make it more difficult for women to get birth control at a pharmacy, so forget that they have the insurance to cover it/help cover it, forget that they might have the money out of pocket to buy it...there are efforts to turn this country into a no-choice, be celibate, rely on condoms if you're wanting birth control, or abstain type of place.

This is part of a larger attack on women and I think it's worth being upset about that. When people start religiously objecting to Viagra and condoms and vasectomies, I'll feel a little more at ease about it all.

Dear you,

I posted on your site, now quit slacking off and approve my comment.

Also, would it be possible to make it so Pwebbers can post over there using their forum accounts? I don't want to use Facebook or any of the other random options and it seems a bit silly to make us post as "guests" on our sister site.

Dear You,

It's sweet how you love ro snuggle, especially after you eat. I love how you tenderly hug my breast the way I imagine you will someday hug a stuffed animal or favorite blankie, eyes closed, looking at peace and blissful. But, please, could you turn off the spidey-sense that tells you instantly when you have been put to sleep in the crib? Your father would like ro quit sleeping on the floor.

Love,
Mama

Also, would it be possible to make it so Pwebbers can post over there using their forum accounts? I don't want to use Facebook or any of the other random options and it seems a bit silly to make us post as "guests" on our sister site.

My confidence that I'm able to hack in that support would have been higher with the default comment system... I'll look into whether it can be done with Disqus, tomorrow.

ETA: Ah, it's quite simple, really. We just pay them $300/month. I'll let you handle collecting funds, Josh.

Dear classmates,

STOP POSTING PICTURES OF CLIENT OWNED ANIMALS ON FACEBOOK! Seriously! We get at least 2 nasty grams a year about how that is not only inappropriate, but ILLEGAL. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, quit being idiots. You're about to be doctors.

Annoyed,
Kim

Dear Ewok,

If I am productive as I hope to be this week, I'll be mailing a wonderful reply to your letter. Okay, it probably won't be that wonderful (no drawings this time), but mail is good for the soul!

Dear Metra,

Take my money before I keep seeing the credit on my credit card and spend it. You gave me my pass, now take my money! Seriously, it's weirding me out. This transaction was from at least a week ago.

Sincerely,
The person who probably watches her online account a little too closely



Dear Upstairs Neighbor,

What in the hell is going on up there? Did you just newly discover a vacuum and cleaning? Are you *crosses fingers* moving out?! Do not tease me. I wouldn't miss your symphony of "Who the f*** do you think you are?"s and "I locked myself out; let me the f*** in!"s. Granted, you do not yell these every day, so it's not so bad with you up there but occasionally I worry one of you is going to try to shoot the other and aim down and hit me instead. If that moving truck Saturday was yours, you should have asked for help; I would have worked for free, all day long!

Me

Dear Me,

Happy two months!

Wonder when this is going to get old...

Dear Ewok,

If I am productive as I hope to be this week, I'll be mailing a wonderful reply to your letter. Okay, it probably won't be that wonderful (no drawings this time), but mail is good for the soul!

Err...yea. Wasn't productive. Maybe this week.

And congrats on two months! I hope it never gets old--you have to celebrate the little triumphs.

*hugs* :)

You are one of my favorite people and not just on Pweb.

*hugs*

You are one of my favorite people and not just on Pweb.

Aw schucks. You're too sweet.

*big hugs*

*double post*

Dear Pweb,

Why are you so quiet? Was there some meatspace party I wasn't invited to where y'all are chilling? I'm about to start posting incredibly stupid and meaningless things in every thread, just so it looks less dead in this place.

Speaking for myself, I was busy being the walking dead. Or the stumbling alive. I didn't get much sleep going into Tuesday, or Wednesday, or Thursday, and some of that was work, some of it was bladder, and some of it was plain stupidity on my part, but I haven't been fully awake in a little over a week. I'm barely catching up on sleep now and thankfully get to sleep in tomorrow. But yeah, hard to post when you're busy sleeping with your eyes open.

I've been on vacation, and then came back from vacation and gave notice at my job. So I've been busy trying to catch up from vacation, and tie up any loose ends before I leave.

If you want proof that I was on vacation, I posted a bunch of pics: http://www.flickr.com/photos/mitch_j/se ... 076543165/