Dear You 2.0

[neo-dragon]

Rule number 1 of teaching: Students' stupidity, irresponsibility, and poor decisions end up being your problem.

[Confessions]

Dear You,

Please don't. I know you think you want to. But it won't make you happy. You ate. It's normal. It's supposed to stay inside.

Please don't.

-A

[VelvetElvis]

Dear you,

Don't leave the food put on the counter any more.

-a hungry person

[Dr. Mobius]

Dear Noodle,

Way to go, moron.

[Noodle]

Dear Mobius,

I'm a little slow. Finally getting caught up on old threads. I'd say I'm sorry, but I'm not really.

Noodle

[Gravity Defier]

Dear Yous,

Because I can be an over-opinionated jerk, in case anyone is taking my chat commentary to heart, please don't. What I said in Bob is my issue and although I'm acutely aware of how I might be unfairly making it your issue, please tune me out until I grow up. Which...should be any day now. :)

Love,
Me


Dear You,

The headphones, closed eyes, and unfinished lunch sitting in front of me should have been your clue earlier that I didn't want to talk, about work no less, just then.


Dear You,

Seriously, what the hell?

[VelvetElvis]

Dear Mango Smoothie,

Sue Lucky Charms. It's you who's magically delicious.

Helen

[Luet]

Dear you,

Thinking about the cute nicknames you called me when I was little reminded me of the not so cute nicknames you called me. No, not horrible swear words but things that stuck with me nonetheless. When you thought I was being a brat or selfish, you called me Nellie Oleson. And to this day, I am terrified of doing anything that could be viewed as selfish. I always felt like the selfish child in our family just for trying to have my own life. And then when you thought I was being dramatic or whatever, it was Sarah Bernhardt. I had no idea who that was or what exactly it meant when I was little, but I figured it out by the context. Growing up in our crazy family, you really thought that I was dramatic? Sigh. Anyway, I still cringe at your attempts to comfort me because you almost always make me feel worse. I often wonder if you subconsciously are trying to hurt me or if you are truly unaware of the effects of your words. I just wish that someday I could look to you for motherly guidance, instead of the other way around. But I can't see that happening any time soon.

love,
your daughter

[Young Val]

Dear Yous,

I KNOW YOU GUYS ARE READING THIS. ALL 29 OF YOU CURRENTLY VISITING THE BOARD.

Can't you see how unfathomably bored I am? Please, please post.

ENTERTAIN ME.


Merci.

[Jayelle]

Dear you,

You're one of my best friends. Heck I would say you ARE my best friend, but I hate your husband. He needs help. More help. His depression is ruining your life, your child's life and your child-to-be's life. I don't mind being a shoulder for you, but I don't know what to say anymore. His job does not require 70 hours a week and it is not okay that he sleeps the entire weekend away. You need support. You need counselling together. Things are not going to magically change unless you make a really big effort with him. He needs to know how unhappy you are.
I wish I could do more.

-your shoulder.

[Gravity Defier]

Dear Yous,

I KNOW YOU GUYS ARE READING THIS. ALL 29 OF YOU CURRENTLY VISITING THE BOARD.

Can't you see how unfathomably bored I am? Please, please post.

ENTERTAIN ME.


Merci.

Seriously. 27 posts all day*? Ridiculous. Where's that dang thread I made showing you all how to fix this?

(*I only know that because I did a screen capture when we hit the big 90,000 posts last night.)

[Luet]

For my part, my internet was down most of the day. I could only get online with my phone. It's back now but I'm drugged, post-migraine.

[starlooker]

Dearest, Darlingest Husband,

As a long-time cat owner, may I offer you a bit of insight? The number of times Tara poops on the floor in a week is directly inverse to the number of times you clean her litter box.

Love,

Snugglebunny

[Luet]

How many times a week does your husband clean it? We have two cats as well and I try to get my husband to do it 3x but it usually turns out to be 2x. Yes, it's his job because that was the deal when we got a second cat.

[Dr. Mobius]

Dear volunteer firefighters,

I realize you're responding to a late-night emergency at high speed, but could you please be courteous to on-coming traffic and dim your headlights? I would slow down and move over to the shoulder to give you the right of way, but that's a little hard to do when your headlights are blinding me from seeing your blue light.

[Confessions]

Dear you,

I am so incredibly jealous of you. It makes me feel like such a zero.

[Gravity Defier]

Dear You,

You're ruining my routine. Didn't anyone tell you people, when you move into someone else's house, you don't ruin their routines? Yeah, yeah, Judge Wapner, bed at 11, boxers at K-Mart...I could be more flexible but come on!

[Gravity Defier]

Dear You,

That some may be thinking the exact things about me is not lost on me, so I'll just point that out from the beginning and say that it can't be helped; I refuse to be like you in actuality.

You are a selfish coward, a kiss-ass, and two-faced, and seeing you in this light has been very, very hard for me. I used to respect you beyond words and now I can barely stand to be in your presence.

Maybe my style of picking up friends (fighting first, best friends second) is unhealthy but at least both sides know going in that we're not going to be scared to speak to each other and be open and honest with our opinions.

All I see from you now is "Liar." I'm sad about this, more than I can say.

-Alea

[Dr. Mobius]

Dear Yous,

I KNOW YOU GUYS ARE READING THIS. ALL 29 OF YOU CURRENTLY VISITING THE BOARD.

Can't you see how unfathomably bored I am? Please, please post.

ENTERTAIN ME.


Merci.

Most of the 30ish guests we've been having recently was due to the forum not properly recognizing the Baidu spider (the Chinese equivalent of Google) and listing it as dozens of separate guests in the online list instead of one bot. It has now been fixed. Sorry for any frustration this may have caused.

[Platypi007]

Dear Yous,

I KNOW YOU GUYS ARE READING THIS. ALL 29 OF YOU CURRENTLY VISITING THE BOARD.

Can't you see how unfathomably bored I am? Please, please post.

ENTERTAIN ME.


Merci.

Most of the 30ish guests we've been having recently was due to the forum not properly recognizing the Baidu spider (the Chinese equivalent of Google) and listing it as dozens of separate guests in the online list instead of one bot. It has now been fixed. Sorry for any frustration this may have caused.

A Baidu spider sounds dangerous. (In that it is an exotic sounding spider, not a Chinese search engine.)

[Gravity Defier]

Sorry for any depression this may have caused.

There, made that accurate for me. I thought we had a lot of lurkers and now it feels empty. Oh well, at least it's more accurate. I'll take accurate any day over the alternative.

[Dr. Mobius]

The accuracy is really just a bonus. The main reasons to make sure your forum is properly recognizing search bots is to reduce server load while ensuring that the bots operate properly and efficiently. Allowing the bots to do their job could potentially lead to more newbies finding Pweb as the site becomes listed on more search engines and ranked higher.

[Mich]

Dear Yous,

Look, I know how much my car is worth. I've talked to a number of mechanics and used car salesman and good friends who work on cars. They all agree that, despite the fact that the engine pretty much needs to be completely overhauled, it's worth three times the amount that I'm posting it on Craigslist. I put it for such a cheap price because I just want it out of my hair and wanted to generate lots of responses and want to cut through all of the bartering bullcrap.

So stop offering me half of what I listed. There is no point to it. The purpose of bartering is for you to get a good deal: you already are. I'm already losing money. Stop preventing a sale, or I'm going to post it for the full price on Craigslist and let one of you talk me down to a few hundred more than I'm currently listing it.

Signed,
The guy who's getting more pissed off with each stressful day

[Luet]

Stop preventing a sale, or I'm going to post it for the full price on Craigslist and let one of you talk me down to a few hundred more than I'm currently listing it.

Unfortunately, you will probably have to do that. People on CL expect to barter. You have to play their game.

[Petra456]

Dear Yous,
So stop offering me half of what I listed.

I had to list my car for double what it was worth just to so people felt like they were getting a deal. All the emails I got back instantly cut the price in half.

[powerfulcheese04]

Dear You,

I miss you today.

Love always,
me

[Mich]

Unfortunately, you will probably have to do that. People on CL expect to barter. You have to play their game.

I had to list my car for double what it was worth just to so people felt like they were getting a deal. All the emails I got back instantly cut the price in half.

I know, just so dumb when I've told three of them TO THEIR FACES that this is what I did. One of them even quoted to me what it should be selling for and then trailed off when he realized that was exactly how much I posted it for. "So, uh, what is the absolute lowest you'll go?"

[zeroguy]

Mich, I wish/hope you sold something sometime that I want to buy. I f****** hate haggling.

[Jayelle]

Dear all,

[Luet]

My husband had never heard of the "Keep calm and..." thing. He has obviously been under a rock and not on etsy.

He has also never heard of 4chan or the word "meme". Which I don't think I would have either if it wasn't for pweb. You guys keep me so hip.

[VelvetElvis]

We're all very hip people.

[Syphon the Sun]

It's hip to be square.

[Young Val]

It's hip to be square.

You beat me to it.

[Taalcon]

Dear local Sheriff's department,

I hope the ticket money from all these traffic traps takes care of your moral bankruptcy.

With love,
Me.

[thoughtreader]

Dear Pweb...
So i kinda let my inner photo whore show tonight. Sorry

Last one I swear Cleo stuck in a chip bag


Teresa