Pasta Power 2011

[Noodle]

Greetings netizens! You probably know by now that I have been nominated for a modship of this here website. A vote for me is a vote for reasoned, responsible, evenhanded, reasoned-responsible-even-handedness.

I promise my first priority as your new mod will he jobs. Jobs jobs jobs jobs jobs. I will also work to restore the Philotic Web army back to pre-crash of 2006 numbers with an aggressive increase in military spending. If I'm elected I promise "no new taxes" but I can't promise I won't increase the old taxes. We'll also reinstate the Oxford coma and allow double spacing after periods.

You have a lot of ways you can spend your vote. The other candidates are all fine members in good standing, but only I can assure you that a vote for me won't be completely wasted.

[Jayelle]

reinstate the Oxford coma.

Beware the tragic Oxford Coma:

[Noodle]

That's what I get for writing my post from my phone. Oh well. I wold go back and edit it, but that would make the joke less funny.

Oh and I don't actually expect anyone to vote for me. I won't even be voting for myself. I put this thread up as a parody. And I didn't mean it to be a parody of brain's post, more of a parody of campaign promises in general.

[Wind Swept]

I wold go back [...]

I found myself reading the rest of your post in a female Russian accent.

[Noodle]

Damnit Mitch!

[mr_thebrain]

parody of campaigns

This is what I was going for

But I can parody negative ad campaigns too: a vote for noodles is a vote for an absentee mod!

Had to be done... It was done with love though

[Syphon the Sun]

Noodle is a blind, bald, crippled, toothless man, who secretly wants to start a war with France. He is a hideous hermaphroditical character with neither the force and firmness of a man, nor the gentleness and sensibility of a woman.

[Noodle]

One of my favorite political parodies: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yBfR6wYnGZI" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Not only because it combines my love for John Hodgman, Jonathan Coulton, TMBG, and Scott Bateman.

[zeroguy]

Noodle, he kicks children in the face. Nice.

[mr_thebrain]

awesome. i seriously LOLed at that

[VelvetElvis]

political apathy.

[Noodle]

This is PWeb. We speak english. If you want to post here, learn it.

For the record, I've only kicked three children in the face, and each one deserved it.

[VelvetElvis]

What about the French Canadians?