Wedding Planning!

Talk about anything under the sun or stars - but keep it civil. This is where we really get to know each other. Everyone is welcome, and invited!
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Jayelle
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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Jayelle » Mon Jun 11, 2012 4:33 pm

Congrats Adam! I'm so happy for you.
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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Gravity Defier » Mon Jun 11, 2012 9:23 pm

Dinner rehearsal:
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Dinner rehearsal:
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Church pre-decoration:
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Getting ready:
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Other groomsmaid and me:
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In between that and this, there was a ceremony! Adam, ever anxious to be married to the lovely Renee, said he would marry her before the pastor person finished saying all the vows or whatever they're called. It was hilarious and sweet and I loved standing at his back, in support of this marriage.
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Getting into the vehicle:
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That "Just Married"? Yeah, I did that.
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Delicious cake:
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Our tables, all named after a love story (movie):
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First dance:
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Being bombarded by the camera-whore:
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Cutting the cake (I had gone to the bathroom and came back to them in the middle of this...some warning, guys, sheesh):
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Shot from outside:
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Garter throw time!:
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It took something like 3 or 4 attempts to make that sucker fly into the crowd of gentlemen waiting to catch it:
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Me back at the hotel, preparing for my Clockwork Orange audition:
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My corsage/boutonniere, a table flower, and one of the flowers from the bride's bouquet:
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I didn't get any pictures of us in the church, of course, nor did I get any of Adam and I during the money dance or otherwise but the professionals got plenty of those, so I'm not too worried about that. :)

ETA: Stole this from someone on Facebook.
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Last edited by Gravity Defier on Mon Jun 11, 2012 11:12 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Dr. Mobius » Mon Jun 11, 2012 10:00 pm

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby LilBee91 » Mon Jun 11, 2012 10:14 pm

You look amazing!

So do the bride and groom, and blissfully happy as well, but that's another topic entirely.
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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Young Val » Tue Jun 12, 2012 7:09 am

Alea, you look foxy! I am in love with whoever did your makeup, because you look utterly wonderful and also utterly like yourself.

The bride and groom of course look fantastic as well. I adore the neckline on Renee's gown. The whole thing looks wonderful!
you snooze, you lose
well I have snozzed and lost
I'm pushing through
I'll disregard the cost
I hear the bells
so fascinating and
I'll slug it out
I'm sick of waiting
and I can
hear the bells are
ringing joyful and triumphant

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby steph » Tue Jun 12, 2012 9:38 am

Yay! Pictures! Thanks for sharing, Alea.
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I see so much magic, though I missed it at the time." - Jamie Cullum

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby powerfulcheese04 » Tue Jun 12, 2012 11:17 am

You look hot, Alea.

Adam and Renee, your wedding looks beautiful! Have a happy honeymoon and a happy life.
-Kim

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Gravity Defier » Tue Jun 12, 2012 4:32 pm

Yay! Pictures! Thanks for sharing, Alea.
Of course. :)

And thanks for all the kind words. The makeup people were great (Merle Norman or something like that); they were very respectful of my not wearing makeup usually and managed to apply it in such a way that I didn't feel it once it was on.
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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Eaquae Legit » Wed Jun 13, 2012 4:47 am

Congratulations, Adam and Renee!!!

Alea, you look fabulous!
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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Young Val » Sat Jun 23, 2012 10:44 am

We bought wedding bands today!
you snooze, you lose
well I have snozzed and lost
I'm pushing through
I'll disregard the cost
I hear the bells
so fascinating and
I'll slug it out
I'm sick of waiting
and I can
hear the bells are
ringing joyful and triumphant

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby starlooker » Sat Jun 23, 2012 11:28 am

What's it look like?

In semi-related news, I got my rings back on yesterday! A bit tighter than they used to be, but I'm sooo happy!
There's another home somewhere,
There's another glimpse of sky...
There's another way to lean
into the wind, unafraid.
There's another life out there...

~~Mary Chapin Carpenter

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Young Val » Mon Jul 02, 2012 10:21 am

Can we talk about stuff? Because I totally want to talk about stuff.

I am in that part of the process where my wedding is now its own thing. It's alive. It's lumbering along. It is separate from me, and while others might find that relinquishing of control (and, perhaps, responsibility) nerve-wracking, for me is is just AWESOMESAUCE ALL THE TIME.

Dude. I am getting married. And then there will be a party. And then we will run away to the lake and not talk to anyone else for, like, a week. IT'S ALL SO AWESOME.

That's not to say that s*** isn't still going wrong left and right, because it ABSOLUTELY IS, it's just that I've entered this magical realm of mindspace wherein I straight-up don't give a f*** anymore. (It is fantastic, here, by the way. You are handed your relaxing beverage of choice upon entrance, and they will play whatever music you want. I'm totally staying).

We picked up our wedding bands on Saturday! Or rather, we picked up MY wedding band on Saturday, because David's wasn't there. This is one of the many things still going wrong. Also, they originally ordered both the wrong size and the wrong RING for my band, but they managed to sort that out eventually. So I have my band! And I love it. And I want to wear it immediately, and it's particularly frustrating to me (in a lovely way) that I can't wear it for another 60 days.

There was a wedding band that matched my engagement ring as a set, but I absolutely loathed it. And then I tried on lots and lots of others and didn't find anything I really loved, and then I figured I'd just get something simple and be done with it. But at the last place we went, the shop girl pulled out this one, and I was like, "Um, no." But she insisted I try it on, so I did, and was promptly smacked in the face by how much I adored it. I know it's not a look everyone would want--it doesn't sit flush up against my engagement ring, it's intricate, it's not really that sparkly--but to me, the scalloped shape mimics the leaves engraved in the side of my ring, and it's just so, so pretty to me, and I have never ever been a matchy person. So for me it's perfect.

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I also spent a ton of money at Sephora (on makeup itself, and learning how to apply it), and bought a dress and shoes (yellow wedge heels. what?) for my engagement photos next Sunday. Now I just have to choose which of my ten zillion cardigans to pair it with. I've also rescheduled my haircut for Saturday afternoon, instead of Sunday morning as originally planned, because our engagement shoot is happening first thing in the morning at the farmers market! (Hooray!)

RSVPs continue to roll steadily in with only minimal drama. I still have no idea what shoes or jewelry I'm wearing, David still doesn't have a shirt or tie, no ties for the groomsmen yet, and I've got one bridemaid without a dress.

Thinking of saying "screw it" to all extraneous paper, like ceremony programs. They'd be nice, but I don't think I care at this point.

Ceremony stuff going more or less well. Chris is mailing in his credentials this week, so fingers crossed that they're accepted.

Paper flowers will never, ever, ever be done.
you snooze, you lose
well I have snozzed and lost
I'm pushing through
I'll disregard the cost
I hear the bells
so fascinating and
I'll slug it out
I'm sick of waiting
and I can
hear the bells are
ringing joyful and triumphant

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Young Val » Sun Jul 08, 2012 11:48 am

We took engagement photos today! And I have to say, I love my photographer SO MUCH. I am planning to trick her into being my friend.

We shot the photos a the farmers market, and then in a nearby park. I'm super excited to see how they turn out!
you snooze, you lose
well I have snozzed and lost
I'm pushing through
I'll disregard the cost
I hear the bells
so fascinating and
I'll slug it out
I'm sick of waiting
and I can
hear the bells are
ringing joyful and triumphant

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Petra456 » Sun Jul 08, 2012 12:45 pm

I'm super excited to see how they turned out! A farmer's market seems the THE perfect place to take engagement photos.
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And there will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears.
And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears.
Get over your hill and see what you find there,
With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair.

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby LilBee91 » Sun Jul 08, 2012 1:52 pm

A farmer's market is a genius idea. I'm sure they will look phenomenal. Does your photographer have a blog? My wedding photography blog addiction needs more fuel.
I used to hate gravity because it would not let me fly. Now I realize it is gravity that lets me stand.

Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Dr. Mobius » Sun Jul 08, 2012 2:33 pm

I'm kinda wondering if Kelly's photographer is the same one I've seen at the last five or so weddings I've been to. I'm starting to think she's the Santa of wedding photography and does all weddings everywhere.
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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Young Val » Sun Jul 08, 2012 3:20 pm

Here's her website: http://www.kngsommers.com/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false; (which does include a blog).

Updates have been slow there, though, because she just recently gave birth to twins!
you snooze, you lose
well I have snozzed and lost
I'm pushing through
I'll disregard the cost
I hear the bells
so fascinating and
I'll slug it out
I'm sick of waiting
and I can
hear the bells are
ringing joyful and triumphant

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby locke » Mon Jul 09, 2012 10:13 am

Here's our photographers' blog, it'll probably be another month yet before we get pictures and longer than that before we make the blog, but our engagement pics do have a blog entry on here.

http://www.micahandmegan.com/blog/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
So, Lone Star, now you see that evil will always triumph because good is dumb.

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Young Val » Tue Jul 10, 2012 9:40 am

Adam, while Alea's photos were lovely and very much appreciated, you need to recap your wedding for us, damnit! Or send Renee in to do it! I want to hear from those who have forged the path before me!
you snooze, you lose
well I have snozzed and lost
I'm pushing through
I'll disregard the cost
I hear the bells
so fascinating and
I'll slug it out
I'm sick of waiting
and I can
hear the bells are
ringing joyful and triumphant

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby locke » Tue Jul 10, 2012 12:35 pm

Well we won't get wedding photos for a month yet, we just got a HD to ship off to our videographer so we can have a copy of all the raw footage as well, and we still haven't even gotten honeymoon pictures posted to facebook. And Renee's still in the middle of thankyous (I'm not allowed to do them), trying to knock out some every night. Today is our one month anniversary, which is hard to believe. We've also scheduled a house warming for the first weekend of August, so we're trying to get the spare room cleaned up and move in the remainder of Renee's stuff in there (her bed, so we have a spare, her desk, so we can both work in there, and her filing cabinet. So we probably won't post any pics of the house until we get everything in order.

The wedding was fantastic. It basically went off perfectly with one scary hitch. Recalling details is somewhat hard, things are sort of a blur.

The night before was rehearsal, Alea was very nearly late. She got stuck in NHL playoffs (game five or six, I think) traffic trying to get to the church. The most memorable thing about rehearsal was Alea sprinting down the aisle when she did arrive. We whipped through the ceremony twice and everything seemed good. We went off to rehearsal dinner at Renee's favorite restaurant. There we had a few speeches from bridal party people who wanted to speechify, and gave out gifts, Renee had gotten jewelry for her bridesmaids and I got kindles for my groomspeople. I figured this was a good way to bridge the gap of experience between all my friends, my brother and I grew up playing videogames as did Dusty and I though we would also trade all our scifi & star wars books back and forth. Cristina and I had tons of college classes together and are constantly recommending books to each other, and well Alea=Ender's Game. I didn't like any of the other groomsparty gifts that were suggested on wedding sites, very few worked for a mixed gender party, and they rarely seemed commensurate in value to the typical bridal party gift of jewelry. That night, my family and I relaxed around the pool, then my brother, cousin and I went out for beers.

I got to the church with my groomsman, Dusty, and my brother. We met my dad there (since he had to ferry my mom and sisters around earlier as they got hair and makeup done). And everyone got dressed and waited around for the photographer. We got pictures with my wedding party and he got some of me by myself. Alea got to decorate the car. Then it was kind of a waiting game, trying to remember everything I was supposed to do. About twenty minutes before the wedding lots of people started arriving. I got a bit tired of accepting all the congratulations, and didn't want to get tied up, so I went and 'hid' in the area where we'd be entering from. I was somewhat nervous, but just focused on breathing and trying not to stress about anything, or really think of anything that could go wrong. Just breathing seemed to work, though every single person that came back there kept continually asking me if I was okay, which was irritating, because I felt fine for the most part, it was to avoid stress of too many people that I absconded. :D

In any event, the groom's party soon entered and then waited for all the bridal party to come down the aisle. Renee looked absolutely wonderful, and once I saw her, all nerves vanished. The church has a great organ, and the Bridal March or whatever sounds fabulous on it.

Due to some confusion with the rehearsal, I jumped the gun a bit at the point where I say, "I will" which was before her dad says, "her mother and I" because in rehearsal, the pastor said he'd ask me the question to which I was supposed to respond I will. He asked a question, paused and I responded, turned out he had a few lines he was supposed to say before I gave my answer, oh well, it got a good laugh.

Then, I went down to Renee and her dad, and we followed the pastor back up on the stage too soon (I did know we weren't supposed to go up yet, but Renee started, and so I had to follow (this may have been for the best).

As we were walking up, Renee's Dad went to sit down, But he was struggling to sit, and sort of half-collapsed into his pew, clutching his left side. Although Renee's back was to that side, because we'd turned sideways at that point, she caught it out of the corner of her eye and I could tell she was freaked out. I could see pretty clearly Renee's mom, loosening his tie, unbuttening his jacket and undoing the button on his collar. He didn't look good, but was waving off help somewhat, one of Renee's mom's good friends that was helping with the wedding is also an ER nurse (as is her husband) so they were basically up at the front anyway, and moved in to help her dad, though he was waving off assistance.

The pastor had no clue this was happening, I was keeping up with it with occasional glances over there, and Renee, who couldn't turn around or crane her head around, kept trying to look sideways to see. I kept mouthing to her, it's okay, and "he's okay" because he did look alright, in general, and there were a lot of people there that I trusted that if a heart attack were happening would stop the ceremony to get him to a hospital.

All of this happened in about thirty seconds or less, most of the audience not watching Mike was as unaware as the pastor, and by this point, the pastor started asking us questions, and then there were hymns and music and readings and more questions and stuff and then the vows. All of those details, despite being involved in all the picking and choosing of it are pretty much a blur. I know I helped pick the readings, but I can barely remember my sisters as distinct individuals reading, it's very blurred. I know we had the John Lennon song, "Grow Old with Me" (in the style of Mary Chapin Carpenter) sung, but I barely remember it. and we had Renee's favorite hymn. We walked out to Water music on the organ. :-p Sorry I'm bad with so many of these details.

We got the rings on with little difficulty, I managed to get Renee's over about half her knuckle and she discretely with basically one hand got it on the rest of the way, not sure how she did that, it was like a magic trick, she flexed her hand and I saw fingers move and suddenly it was on. No such luck with mine, she couldn't get it over my knuckle so I had to force it over, since it's a rather tight fit.

For the lighting of the unity candle, all four of our parents were supposed to come up, but via some silent agreement/signaling, just the moms came up to do it, since Renee's dad was in no shape to do so.

We exited, waited for the bridal party and family to exit, we got word that Renee's dad was okay: he never wears collared shirts or ties, and his collar was too tight and restricted his circulation a little too much, so he was having trouble breathing. On top of this he had the stress of wanting to be perfect for his little girl, so that whole walking down the aisle and giving her away part was stressful. Additionally, he hadn't eaten anything that day because he was nervous (wedding was around 4pm), but had a bud light, so his blood sugar was way low. By the time we got to pictures he was back to his normal self, the water and crackers had rejuvenated him.

By the time the bridal party had exited, Renee and I went back in down the side entrance and dismissed all the guests pew by pew. This gave everyone a chance to hug us or shake hands, congratulate us, etc. And it gave us a chance to acknowledge all our guests, it took maybe five-ten minutes but was definitely worth it. This was special to Renee because a huge part of the guests at church were people she knows there but who we couldn't also invite to the reception. Interesting side effect, we actually had time to eat at the reception without being interrupted every 10 seconds by someone else (we also made our rounds at the reception) who wanted to congratulate us because they all got that opportunity at the church. Honestly, while at our sweetheart table we were photographed by maybe half a dozen people and approached with a congratulations by fewer than that.

On the drive to the reception, our driver, a close family friend, thought it was a terrific idea to talk about what happened to Mike for half the drive, that made me mad, but I tried to diffuse the topic and change it to other topics.

At the reception, we got on a golfcart with our photographers and drove to the pond on the golfcourse for some pictures. Then we went back to the reception hall to a private room so Renee could freshen up and have her dress bustled and such like, by the time all that was done, cocktail hour upstairs was over and it was time for our grand entrance.

We had the bridal party enter in pairs, to "I'll be There for You", since Friends is Renee's favorite show of all time, and Renee and I entered to "The Power of Love" from Back to the Future (which got a huge cheer), and imo was one of Renee's best music choices of the night.

After our grand entrance we went immediately into our first dance, Zac Brown Band's "Free" which is 'our song'. We'd practiced dancing some, so we didn't have to do the hug and wobble style of 'dancing' so I got in a couple twirls, but we didn't try any dips since we'd barely practiced those.

Then we sat down, and they started serving salad, after the salads were served we had the speeches from the best man and maid of honor. My brother winged it, which is what I did at his wedding, and it was fine and nice, I've no clue what he said, other than, "I stopped playing videogames with him when he got better at them than I was." Megann had a lovely speech all written out. Neither were very long.

Then I think we did father daughter dance and mother son dance. And salad got cleared and entrees were served. During dinner, we had the two fathers give their speeches, both of which were lovely.

Then the party got started, the little girls had long since claimed the dance floor and were entertaining everyone. We got a money dance started (3 songs long) and netted almost 400, which came in handy on the honeymoon. We did lots of other dancing, helped out by our amazing Deejay. We did rounds. Our photographers stole us once or twice for pictures on the balcony, and during one dance I got a big dip and kiss in on Renee. :D Then there was cake, Renee got my nose with frosting (deliberately) so since she was sneaky about dodging my attempt to return I got her nose on a second try. :D More dancing and sooner than I would have thought, the night was over. Dusty drove us to our hotel, where Renee and her dad had left her car that morning.

It took nearly a half hour for the bellman of the very swanky Langham hotel to bring our bags up. Infuriating, learned my lesson not to have bellman when we could easily carry them ourselves. Also the fireplace didn't light itself, and there were no matches or a lighter. :( But the hotel was Lovely, and it was in all a great experience.

The next morning we had some pastry and coffee at the hotel restaurant before packing up and heading over to Renee's house. We stopped at the camera store on the way for a new battery, because I found out at the hotel room that my camera battery had not held the charge, despite my charging it the day before. This was probably good because we had a brand new battery for the honeymoon. Then we met some of Renee's family and all my out of town family at Renee's house for brunch. There we got to spend some family time and then open all the wedding gifts/cards. Then Renee and I were off to our house. She decided to repack her suitcases and I went off to the bank to deposit all the checks/cash so that we'd have money for the honeymoon (the wedding gifts we got just about perfectly covered all our honeymoon expenses, except for the rental car upgrade). I got back to the house and made lemonade from our lemon tree since my family was coming by so my grandma could see our place before she left town. Then they were gone and a few minutes later our town car pulled up to take us to the airport. Then we were on our way to Maui!
So, Lone Star, now you see that evil will always triumph because good is dumb.

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby steph » Tue Jul 10, 2012 8:54 pm

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I see so much magic, though I missed it at the time." - Jamie Cullum

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Gravity Defier » Tue Jul 10, 2012 9:09 pm

So, cheesy comment time but that whole wedding experience was one of the most touching, wonderful "moments" of my life and not only do I feel protective of the marriage and all that will come of it, I feel really, really honored to even have been in the same room when it happened. There really are no words to get that point across.

So, thanks for writing that out, Adam. :) It means a lot to have more stuff to remember the day by, I say as though it were my wedding... (I kind of kept a napkin, one of the pedals thrown by the flower girls going down the aisle, my corsage, one of the flowers from Renee's bouquet and a flower from the table...)

Also, way excited for pictures!
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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Young Val » Wed Jul 11, 2012 9:32 am

Thank you!

I love reading about this stuff. It sounds like it was a wonderful day! Congratulations again!
you snooze, you lose
well I have snozzed and lost
I'm pushing through
I'll disregard the cost
I hear the bells
so fascinating and
I'll slug it out
I'm sick of waiting
and I can
hear the bells are
ringing joyful and triumphant

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Young Val » Wed Jul 18, 2012 6:39 am

Engagement photo sneak peek is in!

Image


The hilarious thing about this photo is that it's the only "posed" shot we took the entire time, and it was also the most awkward! the blanket was spread out on a hill, and we had our heads pointed downhill and our feet uphill. David was supremely uncomfortable, both emotionally and physically, and did NOT want to lie down. He kept sitting up and saying, "this is weird. This is really weird."

I'm SO excited to see the rest.
you snooze, you lose
well I have snozzed and lost
I'm pushing through
I'll disregard the cost
I hear the bells
so fascinating and
I'll slug it out
I'm sick of waiting
and I can
hear the bells are
ringing joyful and triumphant

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Gravity Defier » Wed Jul 18, 2012 8:09 am

I cannot stop looking at this picture! It's stunning; great color, great subject.
Se paciente y duro; algún día este dolor te será útil.

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby LilBee91 » Wed Jul 18, 2012 8:12 am

What Alea said.

Plus, I love your dress.

And your hair.
I used to hate gravity because it would not let me fly. Now I realize it is gravity that lets me stand.

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Petra456 » Wed Jul 18, 2012 9:55 am

Your hair is absolutely amazing, and the colors are stunning! Seriously, if I were getting engagement pics done, this is what I would show the photographer as a perfect example picture!
Member since March 16th, 2004.

And there will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears.
And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears.
Get over your hill and see what you find there,
With grace in your heart and flowers in your hair.

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby locke » Thu Jul 26, 2012 12:29 pm

pictures inna slideshow!

We haven't gotten all our pictures yet, but our photographers did send us this slideshow as a preview. :)
So, Lone Star, now you see that evil will always triumph because good is dumb.

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby steph » Thu Jul 26, 2012 1:19 pm

:stamp:

I love the look on Renee's face when she's standing with her Dad before giving her away.

Also, the one in the car mirror brought tears to my eyes.

Renee is so real and so beautiful. And you look so happy.

:love:
"When I look back on my ordinary, ordinary life,
I see so much magic, though I missed it at the time." - Jamie Cullum

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Gravity Defier » Thu Jul 26, 2012 1:27 pm

Renee is so real and so beautiful. And you look so happy.
I'm going to go old school here and say quoted for freaking truth.

My absolute favorite is the image at 1:31 left in the song, which is what, 1:50 into it? But there were so many amazing shots in that bunch. I can't wait to see more.
Se paciente y duro; algún día este dolor te será útil.

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Young Val » Wed Aug 01, 2012 8:55 am

I'm getting married one month from today. I can't even.

I have my final dress fitting on Saturday, to be immediately followed by my hair and makeup trial. We pick up our marriage license on Monday.

Right now our Bridal Party is in various states of half-dress.

I have my dress and that's it. Still need to purchase a longline strapless bra, shoes, and jewelry. Or figure out what I already own that would work.

David needs: socks, a tie, and a shirt--I actually just made an appointment at the Harberdashery to see if we can get one custom-made for him.

Both of my bridesmaids had dress troubles, and the dresses they originally bought have been returned. My sister got a second one she things will work, but my BFF is still searching.

The two groomsmen basically have nothing. We think they're going to wear black suits they already own, rather than asking them to buy new ones, but one of the two still hasn't confirmed whether or not he owns a black suit, or a suit at all. But the shirt and tie thing is still 100% up in the air for them.

Still woefully behind on all crafting, but such is the nature of the beast.
you snooze, you lose
well I have snozzed and lost
I'm pushing through
I'll disregard the cost
I hear the bells
so fascinating and
I'll slug it out
I'm sick of waiting
and I can
hear the bells are
ringing joyful and triumphant

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby steph » Wed Aug 01, 2012 8:57 am

***Sending good luck and perseverance vibes***

You're almost there!!!!
"When I look back on my ordinary, ordinary life,
I see so much magic, though I missed it at the time." - Jamie Cullum

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby Young Val » Thu Aug 02, 2012 11:23 am

Ok, so who got hyper emotional (more so than usual, even) in the lead up to their wedding? I'm not talking about anxiety and frustration and lashing out and feeling stressed and overwhelmed--those were emotions I EXPECTED to feel, and yet I haven't.

Instead I am just generally weepy, and deeply, deeply moved. By everything.

I'm at work today, and so far I've cried three five times with no signs of stopping.

I cried:

-when David sent me a spontaneous text that said "You make me smile!"

-when browsing through the archives of http://www.contrariwise.org" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

-while reading this blog post about marriage: http://bigbangstudio.blogspot.com/2012/ ... riage.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[ETA]

Additionally cried:

-while reading e.e. cummings' "i carry your heart" (which, to be fair, makes me cry pretty much always. This was a strong contender for a reading in our wedding ceremony. It may be overdone, but I love e.e. cummings' fiercely, and I pushed hard for this one. David vetoed it, though, on account that he remained stonily unmoved by it, no matter how many times I followed him around the apartment reading it aloud in an increasingly choked up voice).

-while reading a very kind and thoughtful email from an author who was at the receiving end of a mistake on my company's part, but who has been just lovely about the whole thing.

[/ETA]


Which leads me to my next thing. I want to hear about marriage. What is marriage like, for you? What does it mean? How does it change? What do you do to tend to it?
Last edited by Young Val on Thu Aug 02, 2012 3:57 pm, edited 1 time in total.
you snooze, you lose
well I have snozzed and lost
I'm pushing through
I'll disregard the cost
I hear the bells
so fascinating and
I'll slug it out
I'm sick of waiting
and I can
hear the bells are
ringing joyful and triumphant

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby thoughtreader » Thu Aug 02, 2012 2:15 pm

I Didn't experience huge amounts of any kinds of emotions leading up to our wedding. I think thats mainly because we did a shot gun wedding without any shot gun reasons. We got engaged in February and both were expecting to have a very long engagement/weren't even making any wedding plans. Then in early June we decided we wanted to have a small court house wedding that a few close friends and our parents could hopefully make it to before we moved to TN at the end of july. We didn't plan readings or write our own vows or do much planning other then picking out a judge (who did a WONDERFUL job!) and a place to go to diner afterwords.
Things happened really fast and there wasn't time to fall in love with each detail of our special day as we planned it over a year. but or day was beautiful and the judge was amazing and sweet. Our parents came out, out cake was lovely, and a friend took amazing pictures. And I'm so glad we did it the way we did because I'm pretty sure we would still be engaged if I held out for a big wedding.
Which leads me to my next thing. I want to hear about marriage. What is marriage like, for you? What does it mean? How does it change? What do you do to tend to it?
Marriage is great, marriage is fun. Marriage for me is just about the same as dating/engagement was. Just with great new vocabulary words added in. I think for chris and I this speaks volumes about our relationship before we got married, because over the last 3 years we've been married nothing has needed to be fixed. No huge conflicts have come up, heck I don't even think we have had little conflicts. We took the time before we got engaged to go to couples counseling and work on communication so we understand each other and fix any little things that were off in out relationship. So the last three years have been one big long honey moon stage full of love and sex and caring.

So far there have been little to no changes in our relationship, yes we've moved three times to three different states and that has taken a lot to get used to at times, but being with him made those transitions so much easier because I had my best friend with me to hold my hand and take care of me. We've gone from him being in school full time a me working 2 jobs, to him out of school and unemployed and me on WC with little income, to him working and me staying at home healing. And through all of that we were just us and happy together. We didn't have to adjust to living together because we already had for 5 years. We had already worked through getting used to each other in our space and letting the little things slide.

There are little things we both do to tend to our marriage. Because he works and I am home alone all day he makes sure to call me on his breaks and his lunch every day. It breaks up the monotony of a day home alone from me and I get to hear my loves voice. Now because I'm not working I have reverted back to my normal sleeping time of 2am to 10am while he sleeps from 10pm to 6:30am. I make sure each night when pumpkin time rolls around I pause whatever I'm watching, or put down what I'm reading, and tuck him in. some nights thats as simple as covering with blankets, making sure he is "snug as a bug in a rug", and a kiss good night. Others he needs a cup of tea with honey and snuggling while he drifts off to sleep. I could just make him do it himself but its a chance to connect with him for those last few minutes of his day. and when I crawl into bed hours later he curls around me in his sleep and kisses me on the cheek.

I love our marriage and I love him. I can't imagine being with anyone else.

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Re: Wedding Planning!

Postby fawkes » Sat Aug 04, 2012 10:36 pm

Just got home from our engagement party. I'm so tired I can't even... But it was lovely and such fun, and my feet hurt from high heels. Also gin. And champagne.

If our wedding is half this much fun, I'll be very happy.
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