Confessions of a 20-something mother

Talk about anything under the sun or stars - but keep it civil. This is where we really get to know each other. Everyone is welcome, and invited!
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Postby Luet » Sat Jun 26, 2010 1:58 pm

I can whistle breathing in and out. I just wish I could do that loud whistle with the fingers in the mouth. That'd be awesome.
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Postby megxers » Sat Jun 26, 2010 2:29 pm

I can't whistle at all. Or snap.

Confession: For some reason a bunch of randoms who say they go to a college I am loosely affiliated with (so I guess I may show up in their suggested friends?) are friending me on Facebook. Most of them I've just clicked ignore, but two of them are quite attractive, and one of them is shirtless in his profile picture. I'm going to keep them in the queue because they are nice to look at but I have no idea who they are.
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Postby Luet » Sat Jun 26, 2010 2:48 pm

I can't snap either! I thought I was the only one. My theory is that my palms are really dry (they don't sweat at all) and I think you need some moisture on your palm for your finger to 'catch' on when it lands, and thus make the noise.
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Postby Graff^ » Sat Jun 26, 2010 2:51 pm

One-third of the population can't snap. I thought people who couldn't snap were rare but apparently not. (I can snap by the way) :P
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Postby Bean_wannabe » Sat Jun 26, 2010 3:05 pm

I just wish I could do that loud whistle with the fingers in the mouth. That'd be awesome.
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Postby megxers » Sat Jun 26, 2010 4:03 pm

One-third of the population can't snap. I thought people who couldn't snap were rare but apparently not. (I can snap by the way) :P
Interesting.

Though my reason is probably do to my peripheral neuropathy/weirdly bent fingers problem.

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Postby Graff^ » Sat Jun 26, 2010 4:20 pm

One-third of the population can't snap. I thought people who couldn't snap were rare but apparently not. (I can snap by the way) :P
Interesting.

Though my reason is probably do to my peripheral neuropathy/weirdly bent fingers problem.
Oh, that's intreasting?
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Postby CezeN » Sat Jun 26, 2010 4:59 pm

I can't whistle or blow bubbles with bubblegum.
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Postby Graff^ » Sat Jun 26, 2010 6:30 pm

My friend taught me how to blow bubbles last year, after my mom trying for years. :lol:
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Postby zeroguy » Sun Jun 27, 2010 12:07 am

Confession: I read the last page or so of this thread while whistling and snapping. Unfortunately, I don't have any gum.
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Postby megxers » Sun Jun 27, 2010 12:24 pm

My mother wants to come up here and start the move out process next weekend.

And stay for a week and a half.

Commence general freak out.

It is necessary to reclaim my apartment from the wild.

I've been ready to leave since October but now I'm pretty daunted by the prospect.

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Postby starlooker » Sun Jun 27, 2010 6:20 pm

I can whistle breathing in and out. I just wish I could do that loud whistle with the fingers in the mouth. That'd be awesome.
Agreed.

Although, I must say, NOT being able to do the loud whistle worked out well for me when I got thrown into a group of hospitalized kids once and had pretty much lost control of it altogether (first - and last - kids group, several years ago). I wished I could do the loud whistle, and then started asking the kids if they could. Everyone spent the last five minutes of the group trying to figure it out. A couple of them got close. And then it ended and I got to go on my (somewhat traumatized) way.
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Postby CezeN » Tue Jun 29, 2010 5:16 pm

I just found out who my college roomate is and the name of my dorm...
and, I don't know, I'm having irrational worries.

But though my dorm was described as "s*****", someone reassured me that you don't tend to spend that much time in your room, so, I don't care that much.

That's not what this confession is about.

I have to confess that I'm afraid that I'm kind of worried since my roomate is gay.
Not that I'm homophobic or anything... or that I'm against gays....

It's just, there might be that nagging thought in my head, that he could possibly get attracted to me or come on to me. Pretty stupid since I know gays aren't just attracted to all men, but seriously it would suck if I'm his type or something. I'm not that attractive, so odds are against it :)

But also, I was looking forward to trying to develop a good friendship with my roomate. Not that that can't happen, but from my experience gays tend to befriend mostly females or other gays. If that's the case, then the chance of the previously mentioned is slim. More so it would be if he acted like the stereotype, which hopefully, won't happen.

I must confess that though him being gay isn't like awful or bad, him being gay may lessen the chances of me getting the basics that I want out of a college roomate.
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Postby starlooker » Tue Jun 29, 2010 7:43 pm

Hey, Cezen --

I'm going to give an extensive confessions reply, which I don't normally do, but it's a rambly way of saying 1) I hear you and 2) it's going to be okay.

I had the same sort of irrational worries when I found out my college roommate was a lesbian (although, the difference between our situations is that I had already lived with her for awhile before I found out). Looking back on it now, the worries seem ridiculous. I was somewhat ashamed of those feelings then -- like you, I prided myself on not being homophobic, intellectually I was all pro-gay rights, etc. So, it bugged me to realize my intellectual comfort level was prejudicing me about living with someone I'd already lived with for several months, for heaven's sake.

Fortunately, the intellectual side of myself and the part of me determined to be a good roommate/friend steered me against saying or doing anything stupid on the basis of that feeling. (Well, anything really stupid, I guess. I may have made a few stupid jokes when we were tipsy together a few weeks later that year. Which was good, because after that the taboo was down and we could just talk about it naturally and it quit feeling awkward.)

And it turned out it was not a big deal. SO not a big deal. It was actually pretty cool, particularly that 1) I was one of the few straight people on campus she trusted with that info, and 2) it gave me a whole new perspective and appreciation for issues I'd only understood on a surface level before and 3) I got to get rid of that whole annoying, "okay... that's fine and not that there's anything wrong with it, but what if she gives me lesbian cooties?" feeling, and also, 4) when a sizable majority of my faculty and a sizable minority of students at my grad department later on identified as GLBT, I'd already pretty well worked out any weirdness I felt about it. Including weirdness about feeling weird.

Anyways, you may or may not get along with your roommate, and you may or may not have a good roommate experience -- but that's true no matter what sexual orientation your roommate is. Dude, I was in a triple room at the beginning of my freshman year, and I had one roommate I hated. (Actually, the whole bringing guys to sleep in our room without her roommates' knowledge or permission issue was one reason we did not get along. Which was a disadvantage to having a straight roommate for me. The other girl in the triple and I ended up switching rooms with two of Queen Snotty Bitch's friends a few weeks into the year.) However, the good thing is that, since I hated her, I ended up forcing myself to spend a lot of time in the common rooms and outside, which is how I ended up meeting the people I am still close friends with.
There's another home somewhere,
There's another glimpse of sky...
There's another way to lean
into the wind, unafraid.
There's another life out there...

~~Mary Chapin Carpenter

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Postby Gravity Defier » Wed Jun 30, 2010 1:22 am

I am going to laugh over pretty much all of this tomorrow but right now, I'm majorly bummed over something so ridiculous, I should be laughing right now.

I will expand on this when the time is right; I had to put this out there to provide future-me more fodder for laughing.

I can expand, now. I had just finished the cake when I posted this and it didn't turn out at all how I had envisioned it in my head. There was the mix-up that ended with it being chocolate frosting instead of vanilla, the having an issue lighting the match and it taking 5 strikes to do so, the taking it into the bathroom because 1) I didn't want to raise any questions from my mom (who ended up sleeping through the whole thing anyway) and 2) that was the best room for lighting, sadly, etc. It was funny but I was still bummed it looks so sloppy.

Ridiculous.
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Postby megxers » Wed Jun 30, 2010 7:49 pm

My mother's campaigning for me to visit the boy I asked as my back up date to prom (two years in a row....he said yes both times, we did nothing one year and the second we at least hung out) as soon as I'm in the area because he's "cute now." All of this sounds like such a bad idea. Especially as this is one of those situations where yes, I've been the one stringing him a long a bit. Or maybe more than a bit.

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Postby starlooker » Thu Jul 01, 2010 3:40 pm

I'm not sure, today, if it is worth it after all or not.
There's another home somewhere,
There's another glimpse of sky...
There's another way to lean
into the wind, unafraid.
There's another life out there...

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Postby CezeN » Thu Jul 01, 2010 4:36 pm

Hey, Cezen --

I'm going to give an extensive confessions reply, which I don't normally do, but it's a rambly way of saying 1) I hear you and 2) it's going to be okay.
*snip*
Okay. Glad to know the the experience of someone who's been through the same situation. :)

I messaged him on facebook and we got to talking about ourselves, and he told me that he was gay and he believes in modesty and restraint, so I don't need to worry. And that he started this Gay-Straight Alliance club at his school.
He also said that he doesn't really act the stereotype, which is also good.

So, my irrational worries were truly irrational.
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Postby daPyr0x » Sun Jul 04, 2010 6:15 pm

Confession: I've only now come to terms with the fact that I've worn nothing but my boxers all day long.
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Postby Eaquae Legit » Mon Jul 05, 2010 6:27 pm

What terrifies me most about having children is the lack of sleep. I don't function well on less than 8 hours sleep, and the earlier I have to be up, the worse it is. I also don't do well with disturbed nights. I honestly don't know how I'm going to survive kids. And even when they sleep through the night, they still wake up early. I'm going to be the worst mother ever.
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Postby Jayelle » Mon Jul 05, 2010 7:21 pm

What terrifies me most about having children is the lack of sleep. I don't function well on less than 8 hours sleep, and the earlier I have to be up, the worse it is. I also don't do well with disturbed nights. I honestly don't know how I'm going to survive kids. And even when they sleep through the night, they still wake up early. I'm going to be the worst mother ever.
I was the exact same way. Yes, it can be bad at first, but Ginny now sleeps 8pm - 9am - they can be trained to sleep in!
Also, it's really, really good to have a husband to share the load!
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Postby Rei » Mon Jul 05, 2010 8:53 pm

My parents still insist that on some level I'm a morning person because when I was very very very little, in that time before memory, I used to wake up at 6am.
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Postby starlooker » Tue Jul 06, 2010 11:29 am

I'm getting baby fever really, really badly.

Well, okay, not that badly compared to the general public. But badly for my own baseline functioning.

Which is to say I'm 1) speaking openly with people, including my parents, about wanting to have children someday, 2) frequently tempted to stroll down baby aisles at stores, though I have yet to follow through with this, and 3) picturing idyllic parenthood moments whenever my fiance is especially nice to our cats (who, at some point over the past 1.5 years, morphed into "our" cats instead of "my" cats). Seriously, I think this newest bout got kicked off in its present form by the night in which Tara was scared of a thunderstorm, and I turn around and see him holding her protectively and telling her that it's going to be okay, it's just a little thunder, he's right here, etc., etc.

~~~

In other news, I confess that I like processed foods, damnit.
There's another home somewhere,
There's another glimpse of sky...
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There's another life out there...

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Postby Luet » Tue Jul 06, 2010 12:05 pm

I confess that I'm 33yo and I've never had baby fever. I enjoy babies a lot (even watch documentaries and read books about childbirth) but I never plan to have any.
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Postby Gravity Defier » Tue Jul 06, 2010 1:42 pm

Tara was scared of a thunderstorm, and I turn around and see him holding her protectively and telling her that it's going to be okay, it's just a little thunder, he's right here, etc., etc.
Sexy as hell.

I don't know that I want to have kids -there about a million+ things that scare me about it- but it definitely doesn't hurt a guy's cause to be that way with animals and kids.
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Postby Luet » Tue Jul 06, 2010 2:24 pm

Yeah, my husband is like a kid magnet. If there are kids around, he is surrounded by them. It's adorable.
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Postby Eaquae Legit » Tue Jul 06, 2010 4:20 pm

Kids seem attracted to Rei in the manner of cats: seek out the people who are scared of you and attach yourself to them. It's adorable in its own way, and pretty funny to watch at times.

It's not that he doesn't like them, it's just that he doesn't know what to do with them.
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Postby Confessions » Tue Jul 06, 2010 5:04 pm

I'm using Confessions mostly due to the embarassing, to me, nature of my post. I feel it's pretty obvious who I am, looking back over the post, but this makes me more comfortable.

It's funny, more sad/strange than humorous, how the word "lonely" just about makes me break down if I say it, at the moment.

A week and a day ago, I had walked home after a very stressful few hours at my job, in which we discovered that all of my code had huge compatability problems with a major browser. My boss, who is on a pretty small budget, said that she couldn't pay me to fix it, and that I would have to be off of the clock until either I was able to get it compatable or until she called in her old web consultant, which would cost her more. I resolved to get it fixed at home.

Except that my laptop, in the half-mile from the office to my condo, had bricked. It was plugged in, the outlet had power, and repeatedly pressing the power button elicited no response. And I realized something.

I had no one to go to. In the city I had just moved to and had been living in for almost a month, I knew a total of three people. One I hadn't even spoken to for 4+ years and I had no way of contacting, nor wanted to. One lived across town and wasn't really a friend, despite me asking him a few things about the area and storing a few things at his house during my move down. And one was my boss. Every single other person I knew lived at least a state away.

I broke down for about a half-hour. I had no idea what to do. My computer, my main source of income and main way of keeping in contact with the world, was dead. I called, childishly, my mom. We talked, I implied that I might have to borrow some money to get a new computer, pronto, she said it would be okay. I called my boss, asked if I could use her work computer to troubleshoot, off the clock, and scheduled a time to come in. I called my friend in my home state, gave him a budget, and told him to build me the best computer he could. After all, I had two jobs, one for a business in that same home state, that was paying most of my income while I got situated in my new city and drummed up more business for my boss over here.

The next day, I had managed to fix almost all of the compatability problems, was back on the clock, and was OKing the list of parts, ordered from NewEgg. With luck, I would have them by Friday, with poor luck, the following Tuesday (today). Then I called my coworkers for my other job to tell them I would have a short delay in getting my simulation to them.

Apparently we had all been fired. The contract and grant money had run out. I was employed by a single employer, now, and, with luck, will be able to afford rent and living in the next few months.

Another breakdown.

By Saturday, my parts still hadn't shipped. There was no stated reason, but now I was in the dumps. I had nothing to do in town, was exploring, but didn't know where to explore to. I had an hour on the library computers a day, in which I could conduct research, keep barely in touch, but, for the rest, I felt confined to my tiny apartment complex. My neighbors were still distant and not super-friendly, my boss had offered to call me that weekend if anything went down, but, otherwise, I still knew nobody, I was deep in debt to my parents, and was still alone. And NewEgg said that everything was going smoothly.

Cut to today. I got an e-mail saying there were problems with the shipping. Apparently there is some stupid rule where they can't ship to a different address than the billing address, or the shipping has to be on the credit card somehow, or something. Meaning that, even after getting it sorted out, I would have to wait another day for it to process, then three to five days for the computer parts to arrive--another week. Two weeks with no contact other than occasional phone calls. I had managed to make a tentative friend over the weekend, by going to a nearby disc golf course, but, somehow...

After cancelling the order, calling Tiger Direct, dealing with a not-very-friendly salesrep to built a, hopefully, just-as-good computer, and talking to my mom again, I realized that I was rambling, and she needed to finish the call, so I apologized. "I'm just frustrated and bored and lonely." And, thank God we ended the call (after a sad note from my mom's end), because something about it made me break down again.

Makes me feel pretty childish, like a kid scared at summer camp.

And that's my confession.

Sadly,
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Postby Confessions » Wed Jul 07, 2010 5:04 pm

I'm trying not to ruin my surprise by snooping... but I'm not doing very well.
The password is "guilty"

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Postby starlooker » Thu Jul 08, 2010 11:29 am

When I was up during the wee small hours this morning, watching TV even though I know better, I was seriously tempted to buy the Time Life "Flower Power" song collection that Peter Fonda was hawking. And I've had random 60s songs running through my head all day.
There's another home somewhere,
There's another glimpse of sky...
There's another way to lean
into the wind, unafraid.
There's another life out there...

~~Mary Chapin Carpenter

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Postby Gravity Defier » Mon Jul 12, 2010 11:18 am

Within reason, I really like the smell of sweat - both mine and on guys. Moreso on guys but it's been awhile for that. There is, however, a point where it turns gross.
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Postby Confessions » Mon Jul 12, 2010 3:27 pm

I have a huge crush on Paul Dimeo.
The password is "guilty"

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Postby Wil » Tue Jul 13, 2010 1:24 am

I am sad, and I don't quite know why.

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Postby Confessions » Thu Jul 15, 2010 9:01 pm

I deserve it but that makes me feel s*****; I should be there right now.

As part of the help, not as a cause.
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Postby steph » Fri Jul 16, 2010 8:17 pm

Today is the first day in almost 7 years that I have not had ANY contact with Brian.

He's camping/caving/4-wheeling for the weekend. He left yesterday and will be back monday night. I think he'll be in cell range around Glenwood Springs tomorrow, as they are transferring to a different camp ground closer to the cave that is 2 miles long and you have to lower yourself down into over the edge of a cliff and you have to 4-wheel for 12.5 miles to get to.

I think all this is contributing to the higher anxiety and lower patience that I've had today.
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